I decided to write about an experience I had when I was 19...
I was driving home one cold, rainy November evening with a couple of friends after a night out on the town. I had taken this trip home many times and as such, I had established a routine on which lane I used. At the time, I was driving South in my normal lane--left hand lane on a four-lane road (two lanes going north, two going south). As I drove along, my girlfriends and I were chatting it up. At the time, I heard a voice off to my left say quietly but firmly: "Get right." Now eventually I would "get right" but only after I had driven another 2 miles or so. For some reason, I obeyed, likely because being I was having a good time with my girlfriends, I didn't make the conscious effort to question the voice.
And so I "Got right".
Well, thank the guides in the otherworld's that I did for no more than 6 blocks later was I involved in a terrible 3-car accident. Some drunk, driving a stolen car (car number 1) no less, who was coming the opposite way (headed north), decided to run a left-hand turn signal. As such, he slammed into the car (car number 2) that had been behind me when I decided to "get right" and as a result, went on ahead of me. Car number 2 then slammed into my left front bumper. Thankfully I acted quickly and steered the car to the right, avoiding even further damage.
I went into shock immediately. I had stopped the car and one of my girlfriends kept asking "Is everyone ok? Are you ok? Is everyone ok?" Thankfully we all escaped harm. My other girlfriend had already jumped out of the car and, as I would later learn, was chasing after the passenger of the vehicle who had caused the accident (car #1). She was quite the "kick ass" type. I always loved her for that.
I remember getting out of the car, seeing the damage and immediately wanting to kill whoever had hit me. You see, I had just been in an accident less than 30 days prior. I had been hit by a drunk driver (yes, another one). Rear-ended. I had just gotten my car back approximately 10 days previous. And now some other son-of-a-bitch had hit me yet again? What in the hell was going on? I recall thinking. And if that wasn't bad enough, as a child I had been involved in 3 additional accidents while my dad was driving (all minor, no injury) and for a time would not go near a car without screaming. I put off getting my license as a teenager for reasons I couldn't understand. I wanted to drive but something kept telling me driving was dangerous. I would get hurt. I finally got my license, overcoming a great deal of anxiety. And now, less than 2 years later, this happened.
I became a woman on a mission. Kill the son-of-a-bitch who had hit my car. Given I was in shock, I assumed car number two was at fault. It was driven by a young woman, a few years older than I was. I remember seeing her standing by her car. She had been driving a 4-door pinto wagon (which coincidentally enough the previous accident I had just been in, I had ALSO been hit by a pinto, this time the two-door variety). Her front in was completely munched up terribly. She seemed ok, standing there.
So I walk over to her and began yelling at her. "You hit my car! You hit my car! I'm going to KILL you!" And I really did walk over to her with my hands out, which I was going to put on her throat. I tell you, I have never lost control of myself like that. It was both frightening and envigorating. The look on this young woman's face was one of horror.
Well, thank goodness my girlfriend (not the one chasing after the passenger of the actual vehicle at fault--she was still trying to find him) was watching what I was doing. She started calling my name, running to me. I remember she grabbed me by the shoulders, spun me around and made me look at her:
"Nina!" she yelled. "Nina, LOOK AT ME! SHE did not cause the accident, ok? She's not at fault. THAT guy [pointing off to my right at some guy bent over some unknown vehicle] is the one who hit HER. She then hit YOU."
Slowly it dawned on me. I started to come out of my initial shock. I then looked at her and apologized profusely. I explained about my previous accident, how it had been a pinto too. Thank god she was the forgiving type. I remember going over to her, both fo us hugging one another. And then I looked towards the direction my friend had just pointed me in, to the guy who was at fault. He was being held down on the hood of some good samaritan's car by a big burly man in his 40's. Apparently this wonderful man had seen the whole thing and had seen the driver and passenger attempting to flee the scene. While my one friend went after the passenger (whom ended up getting away), this awesome hero went after the driver.
So I walk over to this prick. "You caused all of this?" I asked.
He wouldn't look at me. I noticed a wine bottle lay near his foot.
"You son of a bitch have you been drinking?" I yelled. He wouldn't respond. He just kept looking down on the hood. I just shook my head and thanked the man, but he didn't seem to have any other purpose but to hold down this driver until the police came. I remember him simply holding down the driver and looking around as if saying "this is my job leave me alone".
The police arrived at this point. One of the officer's came over to speak with me, get my statement, etc. We walked back over to my car and looked at it. It was still drivable. I told him about the voice I heard that told me to "get right". I said if I hadn't, I would have been where the other woman was, the one in the pinto wagon. I would have been the first car hit.
The officer looked at the little front end of my car (1976 Honda Civic) and at the long front end of the pinto wagon, which as I said had crumpled up like an accordian. I'll never forget what he said:
"It's a good thing you listened to the voice. If you hadn't, you and I probably wouldn't be talking like this."
Well, at that, I went back into some place of shock. I kind of swooned, falling into the officer. He held me up, opened up my car door and gently placed me inside. I don't recall what he said, if anything at all. I do remember crying, just overcome with emotion. I also remember I had a gray, rough wool blanket suddenly wrapped around my shoulder's. I guess the officer gave me that. I don't remember.
Eventually, things got cleaned up. The driver was arrested and charged with DUI and hit and run. The passenger was never found. I ended up driving the young woman home given her car was not drivable. She was headed in the same direction as I was. My car was drivable, despite the banged up left front end. I probably should not have driven given the state of mind I was in. I don't remember much of the drive home.
What awaited me at home was almost as bad as the accident. I went straight home after dropping the woman off, taking my girlfriends with me. I thought I might need some back-up.
I was right.
My parents always had the tendancy to question me, not believe me. They still do. I have never understood why. The only time I ever boldly lied to them was when I snuck a piece of chocolate cake when I was a child and when I told them "Yes I tried pot but I didn't like it". Other than that, when asked something, I told the truth. Anyway so I arrive home, wanting nothing more than having them hold me, ask if I was ok and tell me everything would be allright. Naturally given it was late they were asleep. I walked into their bedroom and said "Mom and dad, I need to tell you something."
And so I told them.
Instead of asking how the car was, and not even asking how I was, I was given the silent treatment for a few moments before the grilling began.
"But you just got into an accident less than a month ago! And you also said that one wasn't your fault as well." (Apparently the police report and witness statements didn't relieve any of their apparent doubts I was now seeing they had.)
My mom looked at me and said: "You can't expect us to believe you aren't doing something to cause these accidents."
I thought back to the accidents I was in as a child, each time my dad was driving. Each time, someone else had hit him. I don't recall any grilling of my father at the time. Now I was getting this bullshit treatment?
I looked at my mother and said: "Not that you've asked but I am ok. In fact, if I hadn't acted in the way I did, I could have been seriously injured or killed mom, ok?"
She scoffed at the ridiculous notion of that. Ah, that was and is my mother. Completely incapable of dealing with anything outside of her donna reed "everything is fine la la la" fantasy land. So, I did what I should have done a long time previously. I told both she and my father they were both "fucked" in the head and left.
"Where are you going?" they both yelled after me.
"Anywhere but here!" I yelled back.
Aside from that exchange, about the only thing that was discussed in the day that followed was the obvious transportation issue I now faced. Given my car was going to be out of commission for a week or so to get repaired (by our own insurance given the driver who was responsible had no insurance aside from being drunk and driving a stolen car), I needed to borrow one of their cars so I could get to work and college. That all got worked out and nothing was ever said about it again.
A very common experience in my family. I faced something scary, difficult, emotional and I would usually get blamed for whatever it was. I would then either keep my thoughts to myself or I would blow a fuse, telling them how I really felt while ignoring their attempts to tell me I was wrong, and nothing was ever said about the situation again.
Writing this only validates why I don't spend much time with them as an adult as some things simply never change. And it's too bad for they don't really know me. And I, them. I've certainly tried, but those days are over. Today, I am grateful in knowing that, no matter how alone and lost I have felt in this world for most of my life, I do have some guide, some intelligent being in some other dimension who, at least on that cold, rainy November evening, was looking out for me.
4.04.2009
Saturday Musings
Lots to say today.
It was--is--a beauuuuutiful day today. The first real indication of Spring. The sun was out. Lawn was mowed. Planters and pots cleaned out and, looking too empty against the backdrop of sunshine and freshly cut grass, soon was filled, after a quick trip to the nursery, with pansies, daisies, snap dragon's and other annual's. Afterwards we sat in the sun, watching our puppy dog play with her ball. Tomorrow the bbq comes out of hiding. Next week, we get to work preparing and deciding what kind of a food garden to put in. I am happy to report our lettuce survived the winter. While it didn't really grow, it survived in pots snugged up against the house, so back in the sun it has gone in the hopes it will start to produce. I snacked on a few of the leaves. Nothing like fresh food.
I read through the Portland Alliance, a magazine I had never read before until last week, when I was compelled to pick up a copy. Well, that seemed to be one of those "meant-to-be" moments for right there inside those pages was a man after my own heart and soul and the heart's and soul's of other like-minded folks who have been questioning our monetary-based system and how to design one so that the standard of living for ALL of us will be raised, using machines and technology to provide for such a lifestyle, where the basic fundamental worth and value of all human people are recognized and embraced by all, and where basic rights such as including food, shelter, education and health care, are provided for all. A society where money ain't included in the final picture.
Naturally, I was OVERJOYED to read his words and to know there are ever increasing movement's to establish such a world society. He even mentioned The Venus Project as one such movement. I blogged about that earlier this year. The author of the article, William Daniels, studied the works of a man named Buckminster Fuller. I will be doing the same. There are a lot of new ideas for my mind to embrace, which I know it will. However, wrapping my brain around those ideas will be the challenge. It gives me hope in knowing there are like-minded people all over the globe who believe our planet has the capacity to provide all that we each need, that money need not be the center or even part of it. I'm certainly growing weary of people who talk about the need to reduce the population. Some say by as much as 60% or more. I know to the very core of who I am that THIS IS NOT NECESSARY. It's just a scare tactic meant to keep the basic systems of capitalism/socialism/communism and other unsustainable systems going. Using responsible agricultural and business practices (which are not being employed except for the minority) is at the center of creating such a system.
Along those lines of coincidence and our common connectedness, I had a bit of an experience last weekend in the form of a dream. I was in a grassy field in Oregon, hiding from a sexual predator (white male, 30's, thin build, light brown hair cut in kind of a bi-level). I saw two girls walk by, one about 8, the other around 12 and tried to warn them to stay away from the man. Both were hispanic. The older one was big boned and had very long straight hair. Given I had seen the story about the young girl from California who had gone missing earlier in the week, perhaps I had just brought that into my dream. However, I was not sure who this older, second girl was. I was also unsure as to why I was in Oregon if the (younger) girl was last seen in California. I blew it off as a random event, possibly a friend of the younger girl, that is until a couple of nights ago. While visiting our local co-op, I saw a flyer on their board about a missing 13-year-old hispanic girl from the Oregon coast. She looked very similar to the girl in my dream, enough so that it stunned me for a moment and gave me a chill. I don't know if it's coincidence or not, but I've had enough dreams like this that have later proven to be accurate.
Speaking of, it was my original experience of seeing Laci Peterson in my living room (different house from where we currently live) at 3am to validate the dream I had of her death that sparked an intense fear of the dark, which has only served to royally piss me off given that was one thing I never feared--the dark. At all. It's an odd thing though because I don't feel it every night. There are some nights I am lying in bed, the only one in the house still awake, and I am calm, feeling fine. And yet the next night, I can be almost paralyzed by fear because I think I feel a presence in the living room that wishes to speak with me. Once I turn on a light, the fear vanishes. However, I can be standing in the same place, turn out the light, and I am fighting intense panic. I especially feel creeped out when I am walking away from the living room--as though I feel more vulnerable with my back turned away from whatever may (or may not) be there. Kind of like a child running from the doorway to leap into his bed to avoid that monster that may reach out and grab him from under his bed. I am so embarassed by this but I am so ready to be done with it.
I just don't know how to heal from this one. I do the protection intentions. I've tried facing the fear--taking little steps into the living room, one at a time. I've tried making myself simply sit still in the dark for an extended period of time, especially after I know my spouse and dog are asleep and in another conscious realm. I tell myself I CAN DO THIS I AM CALM. I say things like "I am safe. I am protected." Nothing so far has worked. It's like a huge ball of energy needing to explode. Maybe it's unprocessed terror. I know I was certainly in a complete state of panic and terror when I saw Laci sitting there in our recliner, dripping wet, smiling hugely, sending me a telepathic "Hello! Here I am!". I was so frightened, I couldn't move for a few moments. Given I know I have some sort of ability to communicate with the spirit realm, I really want to "get over" this. One of my desires has been for quite some time to listen to the needs of those who have gone on and relay any messages to their families. And yet, how can I do that with this fear? I can't.
If any of you have any ideas or suggestions of help of any kind, please share them. I've thought about contacting some of the paranormal psychic people I've seen on television but I know they'd charge me quite the fee and, well, my financial status says poverty. Maybe they'd let me bake them some of my magical nut brownies.
I spent a bit of time last night organizing some of my recorded musical files. One of my other fav things is to write music. I have an idea of what to do next with all of these songs I have. I belong to a songwriter's e-mail group (since it's inception in 1998) and read of an independent A & R biz that helps put songwriter's in touch with publisher's, etc. They're rated as being very professional and trustworthy. A rarety in the biz. There's a growing trend of people in the music business who wish to see ALL making a living wage at their art instead of having a couple hundred making hundred's of millions. As long as cash is king, I think it's a beautiful concept. A world where you get to "do" what you naturally love. Contribute it. Have all your needs provided for. Period.
The needs of humanity first. Life no longer being about struggle and survival of the fittest and other archaic, caveperson mentalities. You and I together in the same boat. Same side.
Today I feel hopeful knowing there are others out there thinking the same thoughts and are working to create it all. More hopeful than I have in awhile.
It was--is--a beauuuuutiful day today. The first real indication of Spring. The sun was out. Lawn was mowed. Planters and pots cleaned out and, looking too empty against the backdrop of sunshine and freshly cut grass, soon was filled, after a quick trip to the nursery, with pansies, daisies, snap dragon's and other annual's. Afterwards we sat in the sun, watching our puppy dog play with her ball. Tomorrow the bbq comes out of hiding. Next week, we get to work preparing and deciding what kind of a food garden to put in. I am happy to report our lettuce survived the winter. While it didn't really grow, it survived in pots snugged up against the house, so back in the sun it has gone in the hopes it will start to produce. I snacked on a few of the leaves. Nothing like fresh food.
I read through the Portland Alliance, a magazine I had never read before until last week, when I was compelled to pick up a copy. Well, that seemed to be one of those "meant-to-be" moments for right there inside those pages was a man after my own heart and soul and the heart's and soul's of other like-minded folks who have been questioning our monetary-based system and how to design one so that the standard of living for ALL of us will be raised, using machines and technology to provide for such a lifestyle, where the basic fundamental worth and value of all human people are recognized and embraced by all, and where basic rights such as including food, shelter, education and health care, are provided for all. A society where money ain't included in the final picture.
Naturally, I was OVERJOYED to read his words and to know there are ever increasing movement's to establish such a world society. He even mentioned The Venus Project as one such movement. I blogged about that earlier this year. The author of the article, William Daniels, studied the works of a man named Buckminster Fuller. I will be doing the same. There are a lot of new ideas for my mind to embrace, which I know it will. However, wrapping my brain around those ideas will be the challenge. It gives me hope in knowing there are like-minded people all over the globe who believe our planet has the capacity to provide all that we each need, that money need not be the center or even part of it. I'm certainly growing weary of people who talk about the need to reduce the population. Some say by as much as 60% or more. I know to the very core of who I am that THIS IS NOT NECESSARY. It's just a scare tactic meant to keep the basic systems of capitalism/socialism/communism and other unsustainable systems going. Using responsible agricultural and business practices (which are not being employed except for the minority) is at the center of creating such a system.
Along those lines of coincidence and our common connectedness, I had a bit of an experience last weekend in the form of a dream. I was in a grassy field in Oregon, hiding from a sexual predator (white male, 30's, thin build, light brown hair cut in kind of a bi-level). I saw two girls walk by, one about 8, the other around 12 and tried to warn them to stay away from the man. Both were hispanic. The older one was big boned and had very long straight hair. Given I had seen the story about the young girl from California who had gone missing earlier in the week, perhaps I had just brought that into my dream. However, I was not sure who this older, second girl was. I was also unsure as to why I was in Oregon if the (younger) girl was last seen in California. I blew it off as a random event, possibly a friend of the younger girl, that is until a couple of nights ago. While visiting our local co-op, I saw a flyer on their board about a missing 13-year-old hispanic girl from the Oregon coast. She looked very similar to the girl in my dream, enough so that it stunned me for a moment and gave me a chill. I don't know if it's coincidence or not, but I've had enough dreams like this that have later proven to be accurate.
Speaking of, it was my original experience of seeing Laci Peterson in my living room (different house from where we currently live) at 3am to validate the dream I had of her death that sparked an intense fear of the dark, which has only served to royally piss me off given that was one thing I never feared--the dark. At all. It's an odd thing though because I don't feel it every night. There are some nights I am lying in bed, the only one in the house still awake, and I am calm, feeling fine. And yet the next night, I can be almost paralyzed by fear because I think I feel a presence in the living room that wishes to speak with me. Once I turn on a light, the fear vanishes. However, I can be standing in the same place, turn out the light, and I am fighting intense panic. I especially feel creeped out when I am walking away from the living room--as though I feel more vulnerable with my back turned away from whatever may (or may not) be there. Kind of like a child running from the doorway to leap into his bed to avoid that monster that may reach out and grab him from under his bed. I am so embarassed by this but I am so ready to be done with it.
I just don't know how to heal from this one. I do the protection intentions. I've tried facing the fear--taking little steps into the living room, one at a time. I've tried making myself simply sit still in the dark for an extended period of time, especially after I know my spouse and dog are asleep and in another conscious realm. I tell myself I CAN DO THIS I AM CALM. I say things like "I am safe. I am protected." Nothing so far has worked. It's like a huge ball of energy needing to explode. Maybe it's unprocessed terror. I know I was certainly in a complete state of panic and terror when I saw Laci sitting there in our recliner, dripping wet, smiling hugely, sending me a telepathic "Hello! Here I am!". I was so frightened, I couldn't move for a few moments. Given I know I have some sort of ability to communicate with the spirit realm, I really want to "get over" this. One of my desires has been for quite some time to listen to the needs of those who have gone on and relay any messages to their families. And yet, how can I do that with this fear? I can't.
If any of you have any ideas or suggestions of help of any kind, please share them. I've thought about contacting some of the paranormal psychic people I've seen on television but I know they'd charge me quite the fee and, well, my financial status says poverty. Maybe they'd let me bake them some of my magical nut brownies.
I spent a bit of time last night organizing some of my recorded musical files. One of my other fav things is to write music. I have an idea of what to do next with all of these songs I have. I belong to a songwriter's e-mail group (since it's inception in 1998) and read of an independent A & R biz that helps put songwriter's in touch with publisher's, etc. They're rated as being very professional and trustworthy. A rarety in the biz. There's a growing trend of people in the music business who wish to see ALL making a living wage at their art instead of having a couple hundred making hundred's of millions. As long as cash is king, I think it's a beautiful concept. A world where you get to "do" what you naturally love. Contribute it. Have all your needs provided for. Period.
The needs of humanity first. Life no longer being about struggle and survival of the fittest and other archaic, caveperson mentalities. You and I together in the same boat. Same side.
Today I feel hopeful knowing there are others out there thinking the same thoughts and are working to create it all. More hopeful than I have in awhile.
4.01.2009
Israel and Palestine: The Truth
Written a few months ago, a very relevant, to-the-point perspective of what's going on between Israel and Palestine, a bit of history, some hard-nosed, pointed questions and what the agenda is believed to be. Certainly one thing more than any other has continued to just, well, baffle my mind and that is the number of people who really believe Israel is the chosen land, and the people of Israel, god's chosen people and as such, support for them, even in the midst of their continual attack on innocent civilians, is unwaivering. I mean seriously, this is a completely deeply insane belief. It's not the belief of one who is truly centered in their own mind/body/soul. It is not the belief of one who has done ANY REAL thoughtful contemplation ON THEIR OWN. It's a forced dogmatic thought pattern that borders on psychopathic. The Universal Creator plays favorites? I mean come on now. Favortism? Simply based on location?
Hmm. Ok, fine. Let's play this one out then. Most Christian and Christian-related religions do not believe that we pick our parents nor do they believe we as souls have any choice in what family we are born into. God makes that decision. Taking that further then, a soul born into a family residing in Israel suddenly becomes chosen while the rest of us, well, too damn bad, especially if you happen to be born into a Palestinian family. Ya shoulda tried making an offering to God to be born elsewhere. I hear God likes a good nut brownie.
Onto the next observation. What happens when an Israeli dies? Their physical body dies, therefore their blood, their cells, their lineage, everything that makes them an Israeli citizen is no longer functioning which therefore leads to the obvious conclusion that they are pure energy just like every other being.
I know this. Having gotten to know a family who left Palestine a few years and are (against my pleas) considering a return, having heard their first hand accounts of just some of what these folks experienced (and they weren't even in the most violent area), how they have been forced off their land to the deplorable and frightening daily living conditions they all, as they said "just get used to", if I am ever to encounter, in person, anyone who claims Israel is "it" and the people of Israel, "it" and "chosen", who show unwaivering support for Israel, I am going to drag his or her ass to meet this family and make him or her listen to this family's story and then, ask again, how "it" and "chosen" they believe Israel to be and if it is truly ok for any Israeli to take the life of any of the people in this family. Children included. Land, too. Food. Water.
Like many who speak as I, the term "anti-semitic" is given. In our ever-growing politically correct world, lunacy has replaced thoughtfulness. Reminder: Freedom of expression does not mean being free from disagreeing or being offended. We are creating a world where being offended by someone else's opinions is enough to give out a call for censorship. "They're racist! They're sexist!" Whatever. As long as people aren't actually harming others by threats of violence, physical harm and the like, aren't harassing or denying one a job, a home, an education, etc. then let people have their opinion. And hey, I get pissed off at people who think such things as "women who sleep around are sluts" and "black men are criminals" and "white men are pigs" and the like, and while at the moment of my being angry I may want to slap duct tape on their mouth and haul them off to some land dedicated solely to those of their shared thoughts, I can use my own mind and inner workings to calm myself and realize they're just spewing man-made dialogue and that if I truly believe in Freedom, I support their right to think what they think and speak what they think.
It's so silly, don't you think? Silly, sad. Brutal. Destructive. For in the midst of all of the black and white thinking and religious myth and interpretation, people are suffering and dying. Children are losing parents, parents, their children. And all for what? Simply because a group of people (of both Jewish and non-Jewish origin--certainly not ALL Jewish people support what's going on) use the guise of THIS IS TRUTH AS SPOKEN BY GOD (when in reality it's Old Testament speak--think Jesus would ever take sides in this massacre??), backed with fear to incite a vulnerable, searching and weak-in-the-mind citizen to support an agenda of control and rule while rendering a class of people as unworthy simply due to what family they were born into.
If you don't find this insane, then you're part OF the insanity. But you don't have to be. Spend a month away from the television, from the church, from your bible, from like-minded friends. Get to know yourself by simply being WITH yourself. And then ask yourself this simple question: Is it ever ok to kill another human being who has never threatened or attempted to kill you? (And for the record, Hamas' killing of Israeli citizens is just as wrong, although the circumstances are different.) Listen to your heart, your center, for that is where the truth resides. Forget the words your brain sends you. The brain is limited. But the soul, that is the container of truth. And it is at the center of our bodies that the soul, our truth, most reveals itself.
Hmm. Ok, fine. Let's play this one out then. Most Christian and Christian-related religions do not believe that we pick our parents nor do they believe we as souls have any choice in what family we are born into. God makes that decision. Taking that further then, a soul born into a family residing in Israel suddenly becomes chosen while the rest of us, well, too damn bad, especially if you happen to be born into a Palestinian family. Ya shoulda tried making an offering to God to be born elsewhere. I hear God likes a good nut brownie.
Onto the next observation. What happens when an Israeli dies? Their physical body dies, therefore their blood, their cells, their lineage, everything that makes them an Israeli citizen is no longer functioning which therefore leads to the obvious conclusion that they are pure energy just like every other being.
I know this. Having gotten to know a family who left Palestine a few years and are (against my pleas) considering a return, having heard their first hand accounts of just some of what these folks experienced (and they weren't even in the most violent area), how they have been forced off their land to the deplorable and frightening daily living conditions they all, as they said "just get used to", if I am ever to encounter, in person, anyone who claims Israel is "it" and the people of Israel, "it" and "chosen", who show unwaivering support for Israel, I am going to drag his or her ass to meet this family and make him or her listen to this family's story and then, ask again, how "it" and "chosen" they believe Israel to be and if it is truly ok for any Israeli to take the life of any of the people in this family. Children included. Land, too. Food. Water.
Like many who speak as I, the term "anti-semitic" is given. In our ever-growing politically correct world, lunacy has replaced thoughtfulness. Reminder: Freedom of expression does not mean being free from disagreeing or being offended. We are creating a world where being offended by someone else's opinions is enough to give out a call for censorship. "They're racist! They're sexist!" Whatever. As long as people aren't actually harming others by threats of violence, physical harm and the like, aren't harassing or denying one a job, a home, an education, etc. then let people have their opinion. And hey, I get pissed off at people who think such things as "women who sleep around are sluts" and "black men are criminals" and "white men are pigs" and the like, and while at the moment of my being angry I may want to slap duct tape on their mouth and haul them off to some land dedicated solely to those of their shared thoughts, I can use my own mind and inner workings to calm myself and realize they're just spewing man-made dialogue and that if I truly believe in Freedom, I support their right to think what they think and speak what they think.
It's so silly, don't you think? Silly, sad. Brutal. Destructive. For in the midst of all of the black and white thinking and religious myth and interpretation, people are suffering and dying. Children are losing parents, parents, their children. And all for what? Simply because a group of people (of both Jewish and non-Jewish origin--certainly not ALL Jewish people support what's going on) use the guise of THIS IS TRUTH AS SPOKEN BY GOD (when in reality it's Old Testament speak--think Jesus would ever take sides in this massacre??), backed with fear to incite a vulnerable, searching and weak-in-the-mind citizen to support an agenda of control and rule while rendering a class of people as unworthy simply due to what family they were born into.
If you don't find this insane, then you're part OF the insanity. But you don't have to be. Spend a month away from the television, from the church, from your bible, from like-minded friends. Get to know yourself by simply being WITH yourself. And then ask yourself this simple question: Is it ever ok to kill another human being who has never threatened or attempted to kill you? (And for the record, Hamas' killing of Israeli citizens is just as wrong, although the circumstances are different.) Listen to your heart, your center, for that is where the truth resides. Forget the words your brain sends you. The brain is limited. But the soul, that is the container of truth. And it is at the center of our bodies that the soul, our truth, most reveals itself.
Jailed For Being Poor?
There's more to the story than the headline of course, but essentially, yes, a Michigan woman and mother, who had lost her job and home and was in all ways destitute aside from a meager income working part-time for a friend, was unable to pay for her son's stay in a court-ordered juvenile detention facility was jailed for contempt of court. If that isn't an example of black and white thinking gone to the extreme, read on as to what was also imposed on this women:
"Since March 3, 2009, Ms. Nowlin has been serving her sentence at the Delta County Jail. On March 6, 2009, she was released for one day to work. Once released she picked up her $178.53 check from work thinking that she now could pay the $104.00 to get out of jail. However, upon her return to jail that evening, the sheriff forced her to sign over her check to the jail to cover $120.00 for “room and board.” She was also charged $22 for a drug test and the booking fee."
Ms. Nowlin was finally released on March 30th. Read here for the full story.
"Since March 3, 2009, Ms. Nowlin has been serving her sentence at the Delta County Jail. On March 6, 2009, she was released for one day to work. Once released she picked up her $178.53 check from work thinking that she now could pay the $104.00 to get out of jail. However, upon her return to jail that evening, the sheriff forced her to sign over her check to the jail to cover $120.00 for “room and board.” She was also charged $22 for a drug test and the booking fee."
Ms. Nowlin was finally released on March 30th. Read here for the full story.
What's In That Vaccine?
Read this then ask yourself if you would want any of these added byproducts injected into yourself or your child. Or animal for that matter. (I recently requested our vet to stop inquiring about vaccinations for our dog, asking the technician to put in our file "does not vaccinate".)
Depopulation Trend?
With all of the disturbing talk from government's and ecology groups about the need to drastically reduce population, there seems to be a blatant dismissal (hmm) of what's really going on: declining fertility rates around the globe. Read this interesting piece fmi.
3.29.2009
Pesticide Used In Africa To Kill Lions
I watched this earlier this evening and wept.
"African herders whose livestock and livelihood are threatened by lions are killing them in the most effective and economical way they can. And overwhelmingly, that is by using a cheap American chemical called Furadan. It is marketed as a pesticide, to be used for protecting crops. But it's bought by many to kill animals. And that’s one reason why, conservationists say, Africa's lions are in trouble."
When a lion kills a cow, farmers sprinkle an insecticide called Furadan on the carcas prior to the lions eating it. Furadan, a substance banned in the UK and greatly regulated here in the States, although the EPA is working to get it banned, is cheap and easy to get on the open market in Africa. It is odorless and tasteless and virtually shuts down the nervous system, causing a slow, painful, horrific death.
Lion population has declined upwards of 85% over the past 20 years in Africa for a variety of reasons (mostly if not all due to the actions of humankind). It's on the verge of becoming extinct. It's an atrocity what is happening in Africa, and yet there is always an underlying issue at play that must be considered. When you are a farmer whose livelihood of self and family depends upon "x" crop and that crop is being threatened by outside forces (animals, disease, people...) it's easy to resort to desperate measures to keep that cash flow coming in. Thankfully there are conservation groups who are working with these farmers by reimbursing them financially for any loss of their crop, or in this case, cows. In order to recoop the loss, farmers must allow the conservationists to inspect the cows carcass to ensure no Furadan is present.
Stories like this make me think yet again how (ridiculously) damn important the System creators have made money. When people are willing to kill to survive, to keep from losing an income, you know our species hasn't evolved much beyond the period from when we were dragging our knuckles on the ground. While understandable from a perspective of human survival, we can be doing things differently to ensure such things like this do not have to happen. The idea of these conservationists is simple and brilliant. While it doesn't remove money from the equation (ah but I can dream), it solves the issue plaguing the farmers and the lions. I applaud them for their efforts.
"African herders whose livestock and livelihood are threatened by lions are killing them in the most effective and economical way they can. And overwhelmingly, that is by using a cheap American chemical called Furadan. It is marketed as a pesticide, to be used for protecting crops. But it's bought by many to kill animals. And that’s one reason why, conservationists say, Africa's lions are in trouble."
When a lion kills a cow, farmers sprinkle an insecticide called Furadan on the carcas prior to the lions eating it. Furadan, a substance banned in the UK and greatly regulated here in the States, although the EPA is working to get it banned, is cheap and easy to get on the open market in Africa. It is odorless and tasteless and virtually shuts down the nervous system, causing a slow, painful, horrific death.
Lion population has declined upwards of 85% over the past 20 years in Africa for a variety of reasons (mostly if not all due to the actions of humankind). It's on the verge of becoming extinct. It's an atrocity what is happening in Africa, and yet there is always an underlying issue at play that must be considered. When you are a farmer whose livelihood of self and family depends upon "x" crop and that crop is being threatened by outside forces (animals, disease, people...) it's easy to resort to desperate measures to keep that cash flow coming in. Thankfully there are conservation groups who are working with these farmers by reimbursing them financially for any loss of their crop, or in this case, cows. In order to recoop the loss, farmers must allow the conservationists to inspect the cows carcass to ensure no Furadan is present.
Stories like this make me think yet again how (ridiculously) damn important the System creators have made money. When people are willing to kill to survive, to keep from losing an income, you know our species hasn't evolved much beyond the period from when we were dragging our knuckles on the ground. While understandable from a perspective of human survival, we can be doing things differently to ensure such things like this do not have to happen. The idea of these conservationists is simple and brilliant. While it doesn't remove money from the equation (ah but I can dream), it solves the issue plaguing the farmers and the lions. I applaud them for their efforts.
3.27.2009
Internal Ramblings
Just some of the thoughts and observations going through my mind lately.
Dogs are smart. While I've been told they (and all animals) lack a frontal lobe which means they lack the ability to rationalize, question, etc. and hence operate purely on instinct, I have come to the conclusion that this is a load of crap. Dogs really are like people. Some kind of lack the smart gene, others have it oozing from their beings while the rest of us fit somewhere in between. Not that I'm biased (who, ME??), but I happen to believe my dog is one of the smartest I've had the wonderful pleasure of knowing. Take today for example. I was on the phone with my mom when I let our little pooch in from outside. She's still wearing a little spandex t-shirt from her surgery last week. Before she goes outside to relieve herself, I pull it down over her rear pushing her legs through the two end holes. She isn't crazy about this. In fact, she's sent me plenty of signals telling me "WHEN CAN WE TAKE THIS THING OFF PERMANENTLY". However, she's a real sport and seems to know why she has to wear it.
So back to my story. I let her in. She sees I am on the phone and heads to the back of the house. I haven't had a chance to put the t-shirt back on her hind end so I call for her. She is usually a very good listener, certainly when I make it clear I really need her to come to me now. However, this time, she ignored me. In fact, she sat in the bedroom at the end of the hallway, looking at me with a look that said "what" as I said "come here" repeatedly.
Uh huh. Little stinker. She saw I was on the phone. A landline phone that plugs into the wall, which means I am not free to roam (at least not to where she was). Therefore, she figured I would have to put down the phone and come after her. So she decided she'd take her chances that I would opt to stay on the phone and deal with the t-shirt situation later. She was right. That takes some thinking and planning.
***
Can you take anymore doom and gloom of the current agendas? I can't! I want to be aware but it seems the more aware I am, the more apathetic I feel. It's one thing to be informed and to do the informing, but what good is any of that knowledge without the organization with others and self-empowerment? Winter's left us but I still feel the need for a long winter's nap.
***
I saw a woman on public access television talking about how she and her spouse bought over 70 acres of land for $60,000 back in the day. Blah blah blah. I had to shut it off. I cannot stand hearing people talk about the days when land was affordable for most everyone. Just once I'd like to hear someone like this offer up an acre for a couple grand. Help out those who have been priced out of the market. Start a new trend instead of following the damn status quo/what the market dictates. For all of the progressives in my area and elsewhere, they sure seem to step out of those progressive shoes when it comes to real estate.
***
I made some awesome brownies today from scratch. Real chocolate, dark, organic. Real organic butter. Real vanilla. Organic flour. Lots of walnuts. Oh god are they awesome! Very moist inside with a nice crust. Maybe I can let our local co-op sample them and sell them. They really are that good. (and half gone--at least that's the latest from Mr. N)
***
I need a haircut. Or a thinning out as I call it.
***
I've had some wild thoughts lately. One about our body's evolving so that there is less waste. Sometimes I think "why must I pee/poop so often??" We arrive to a place where we utilize exactly what the body needs, perhaps even leading to the point where there is little (if any) need for the bladder, the kidney, etc. Personally, I feel we're headed to a point where we realize we don't even need a body and can comfortably come and go (in and out of the body) at whim. I certainly feel that thought within me as a pull, a desire.
Along those lines, I had the thought that perhaps this (seemingly) dark agenda to control us, do us in, etc. has behind it an "alien" intelligence that guides the puppets in government to create situations in order that we may wake up to our potential--or as I call it, remembering who we are and bringing this to the forefront of our human experience. I didn't like that thought for it felt like we're all pawns in some experimental classroom, which in a way I guess we are. However, I certainly don't believe this (if true somehow) to be some requirement--simply an experiment we've fallen prey to. I'm certainly of the belief we have had "alien" intervention over the course of our species evolvement. The questions are: is this intervention of the benevolent kind? malevolent? As a bit of both? Certainly I believe beings of ALL kinds have a mix of both good and bad, with some having agenda's for goodness and others for darkness.
Dogs are smart. While I've been told they (and all animals) lack a frontal lobe which means they lack the ability to rationalize, question, etc. and hence operate purely on instinct, I have come to the conclusion that this is a load of crap. Dogs really are like people. Some kind of lack the smart gene, others have it oozing from their beings while the rest of us fit somewhere in between. Not that I'm biased (who, ME??), but I happen to believe my dog is one of the smartest I've had the wonderful pleasure of knowing. Take today for example. I was on the phone with my mom when I let our little pooch in from outside. She's still wearing a little spandex t-shirt from her surgery last week. Before she goes outside to relieve herself, I pull it down over her rear pushing her legs through the two end holes. She isn't crazy about this. In fact, she's sent me plenty of signals telling me "WHEN CAN WE TAKE THIS THING OFF PERMANENTLY". However, she's a real sport and seems to know why she has to wear it.
So back to my story. I let her in. She sees I am on the phone and heads to the back of the house. I haven't had a chance to put the t-shirt back on her hind end so I call for her. She is usually a very good listener, certainly when I make it clear I really need her to come to me now. However, this time, she ignored me. In fact, she sat in the bedroom at the end of the hallway, looking at me with a look that said "what" as I said "come here" repeatedly.
Uh huh. Little stinker. She saw I was on the phone. A landline phone that plugs into the wall, which means I am not free to roam (at least not to where she was). Therefore, she figured I would have to put down the phone and come after her. So she decided she'd take her chances that I would opt to stay on the phone and deal with the t-shirt situation later. She was right. That takes some thinking and planning.
***
Can you take anymore doom and gloom of the current agendas? I can't! I want to be aware but it seems the more aware I am, the more apathetic I feel. It's one thing to be informed and to do the informing, but what good is any of that knowledge without the organization with others and self-empowerment? Winter's left us but I still feel the need for a long winter's nap.
***
I saw a woman on public access television talking about how she and her spouse bought over 70 acres of land for $60,000 back in the day. Blah blah blah. I had to shut it off. I cannot stand hearing people talk about the days when land was affordable for most everyone. Just once I'd like to hear someone like this offer up an acre for a couple grand. Help out those who have been priced out of the market. Start a new trend instead of following the damn status quo/what the market dictates. For all of the progressives in my area and elsewhere, they sure seem to step out of those progressive shoes when it comes to real estate.
***
I made some awesome brownies today from scratch. Real chocolate, dark, organic. Real organic butter. Real vanilla. Organic flour. Lots of walnuts. Oh god are they awesome! Very moist inside with a nice crust. Maybe I can let our local co-op sample them and sell them. They really are that good. (and half gone--at least that's the latest from Mr. N)
***
I need a haircut. Or a thinning out as I call it.
***
I've had some wild thoughts lately. One about our body's evolving so that there is less waste. Sometimes I think "why must I pee/poop so often??" We arrive to a place where we utilize exactly what the body needs, perhaps even leading to the point where there is little (if any) need for the bladder, the kidney, etc. Personally, I feel we're headed to a point where we realize we don't even need a body and can comfortably come and go (in and out of the body) at whim. I certainly feel that thought within me as a pull, a desire.
Along those lines, I had the thought that perhaps this (seemingly) dark agenda to control us, do us in, etc. has behind it an "alien" intelligence that guides the puppets in government to create situations in order that we may wake up to our potential--or as I call it, remembering who we are and bringing this to the forefront of our human experience. I didn't like that thought for it felt like we're all pawns in some experimental classroom, which in a way I guess we are. However, I certainly don't believe this (if true somehow) to be some requirement--simply an experiment we've fallen prey to. I'm certainly of the belief we have had "alien" intervention over the course of our species evolvement. The questions are: is this intervention of the benevolent kind? malevolent? As a bit of both? Certainly I believe beings of ALL kinds have a mix of both good and bad, with some having agenda's for goodness and others for darkness.
3.26.2009
Hey Craiglist: YOU SUUUUUUUCK
I have some things I am wanting to sell on craigslist. However, in a move of stupidity, they decided that in order post anything, one must create an account, which includes providing a phone number for verification. Talk about intrusive and invasive. I avoided doing this for months. Well, I finally caved. We need the cash. So....Upon entering the phone number, a call is immediately placed to the phone whereby a phone access code is given, whereby you then are to enter that code online.
Here's my situation. We own one phone. A land line. We are also on dial-up. That means when I enter our phone number, in order to receive the access code, I must sign off. By the time that is done, the call has already been placed and I must retrieve the code on my voice mail. Sounds easy enough. However, when signing back on again, there is no place in which to enter the access code. All I am directed to is the phone verification page, where I am told to enter my phone number. When I do that, I am told a call has already been placed and to enter the access code on the next page. However, THERE IS NO ICON TO DIRECT YOU TO THIS ELUSIVE NEXT PAGE.
Apparently, Craigslist staff are under the illusion that their users have a cell phone and/or are on high speed internet. They have not planned for the fact that these do not necessarily apply to everyone. I've written these fucking idiots 3 times now, asking for assistance, all to no avail. Apparently I will have to borrow a friend's cell phone in order to get this accomplished.
Ridiculous. Hence my title "hey craiglist, YOU SUCK". If they get back to me I will remove this post. If not, it stays up.
Here's my situation. We own one phone. A land line. We are also on dial-up. That means when I enter our phone number, in order to receive the access code, I must sign off. By the time that is done, the call has already been placed and I must retrieve the code on my voice mail. Sounds easy enough. However, when signing back on again, there is no place in which to enter the access code. All I am directed to is the phone verification page, where I am told to enter my phone number. When I do that, I am told a call has already been placed and to enter the access code on the next page. However, THERE IS NO ICON TO DIRECT YOU TO THIS ELUSIVE NEXT PAGE.
Apparently, Craigslist staff are under the illusion that their users have a cell phone and/or are on high speed internet. They have not planned for the fact that these do not necessarily apply to everyone. I've written these fucking idiots 3 times now, asking for assistance, all to no avail. Apparently I will have to borrow a friend's cell phone in order to get this accomplished.
Ridiculous. Hence my title "hey craiglist, YOU SUCK". If they get back to me I will remove this post. If not, it stays up.
3.25.2009
Insurers Say "We Won't Charge More For Sick People"
Nice little headline, eh? The term 'read between the lines' applies to this one. Also notice the "we will comply as long as American are required to have health insurance" statement.
As I keep saying, remove the concept of profit from the basic human needs: housing, health care, food and h2o. As I also keep saying, if we are to insist on having a monetary based system whereby we insist on having a sliding scale for income/wages, then we must equally insist on having a sliding scale fee on all goods and services.
As I keep saying, remove the concept of profit from the basic human needs: housing, health care, food and h2o. As I also keep saying, if we are to insist on having a monetary based system whereby we insist on having a sliding scale for income/wages, then we must equally insist on having a sliding scale fee on all goods and services.
Continued Intrusion Into And Erosion Of The 2nd Amendment
Uncle Sam says by putting more gun restrictions on private citizens, they can protect you from the boogie man.
Never mind the fact that if someone wishes to kill themselves, they will find a way.
Never mind the fact that if someone has the intention of killing others, they will find a way.
Never mind the fact that pump our children full of toxic shit that alters their behavior.
Never mind the fact that the gov't is 50 plus years ahead of current known technology and can enact a variety of mind-control techniques on the populace at random.
Never mind the fact that the majority of gun owners are responsible.
Never mind the fact that the majority of guns used in violent acts are stolen or otherwise obtained in illegal ways.
Never mind the fact that creating a paper trail is not going to stop someone from committing an act of violence.
Need I REALLY go on here folks?
Never mind the fact that if someone wishes to kill themselves, they will find a way.
Never mind the fact that if someone has the intention of killing others, they will find a way.
Never mind the fact that pump our children full of toxic shit that alters their behavior.
Never mind the fact that the gov't is 50 plus years ahead of current known technology and can enact a variety of mind-control techniques on the populace at random.
Never mind the fact that the majority of gun owners are responsible.
Never mind the fact that the majority of guns used in violent acts are stolen or otherwise obtained in illegal ways.
Never mind the fact that creating a paper trail is not going to stop someone from committing an act of violence.
Need I REALLY go on here folks?
3.22.2009
Tribute To Classic Comedy
I grew up watching Lucille Ball, Carol Burnett, Victor Borge, Tim Conway and Red Skelton. I call such comics geniuses of silly. There was no need to put someone down or attack another offensively or be overly crude or innanely sarcastic (which permeates today's comedy) in order to be funny. There was a sense of joy in what these folks did. Simple, silly and hysterical. Genius.
Lately, our local PBS has been running some classic Red Skelton moments. I want to share (paraphrased) with you a few pieces of his humor. It's difficult to fully get the scope of the humor when you aren't hearing the words come out of his mouth so all I can say is imagine the hysterical fluidity of his voice and face. I laugh so hard, I miss some of the lines that follow.
This particular joke, he's playing Freddie the Freeloader (FF). He's speaking to the gentleman (G) of whom he is giving a shave. I laughed for a long while after hearing this one.
FF: "I was talking with my friend the other day and looked down. Guess what I saw?"
G: I don't know. What did you see?
FF: What did I see? Why I saw an ear.
G: An ear?
FF: Yep. My friend says, 'Whose ear is it?' So I said 'Stick your finger in it and if it feels good, it's yours.'
***
He did these two characters, two seagulls by the name of Heathcliff (H) and Gertrude (G). Here's a couple of jokes using these two birds. When he would share these particular jokes, he'd position his arms like wings and use a silly voice.
(H): Hey Gertrude, did you hear what happened to my cousin Polly the Parrot?
(G): Uh, no. What happened to Polly the Parrot?
(H): She asked for a plain cracker and she got a "salted".
***
(G): Are you worried Heathcliff? You sure look worried.
(H): Oh yeah, I am worried.
(G): About what?
(H): Oh, I'm worried about Willy the Whale.
(G): Willy the Whale? What's wrong with Willy?
(H): Oh well you see, Willy's in love with a submarine.
(G): A submarine?
(H): Yeah. And whenever the sub fires a torpedo, Willy hands out cigars.
Lately, our local PBS has been running some classic Red Skelton moments. I want to share (paraphrased) with you a few pieces of his humor. It's difficult to fully get the scope of the humor when you aren't hearing the words come out of his mouth so all I can say is imagine the hysterical fluidity of his voice and face. I laugh so hard, I miss some of the lines that follow.
This particular joke, he's playing Freddie the Freeloader (FF). He's speaking to the gentleman (G) of whom he is giving a shave. I laughed for a long while after hearing this one.
FF: "I was talking with my friend the other day and looked down. Guess what I saw?"
G: I don't know. What did you see?
FF: What did I see? Why I saw an ear.
G: An ear?
FF: Yep. My friend says, 'Whose ear is it?' So I said 'Stick your finger in it and if it feels good, it's yours.'
***
He did these two characters, two seagulls by the name of Heathcliff (H) and Gertrude (G). Here's a couple of jokes using these two birds. When he would share these particular jokes, he'd position his arms like wings and use a silly voice.
(H): Hey Gertrude, did you hear what happened to my cousin Polly the Parrot?
(G): Uh, no. What happened to Polly the Parrot?
(H): She asked for a plain cracker and she got a "salted".
***
(G): Are you worried Heathcliff? You sure look worried.
(H): Oh yeah, I am worried.
(G): About what?
(H): Oh, I'm worried about Willy the Whale.
(G): Willy the Whale? What's wrong with Willy?
(H): Oh well you see, Willy's in love with a submarine.
(G): A submarine?
(H): Yeah. And whenever the sub fires a torpedo, Willy hands out cigars.
3.21.2009
A Plea To America
This post is about change. It's about changing our concept of what it means to be human. It's about changing how we have been living out in the world. I read a lot of things online about outrage over the banks mishandling of our dollars, over the numbers of jobs being lost, the bailouts, the foreclosures, the credit crunch. And yet, with all of the outrage, the majority of the people are still playing around with old beliefs. In short, people are still clinging to the old archaic system.
People, please. START THINKING AND FEELING AND DOING SOMETHING NEW AND DIFFERENT.
Go to that heart place and feeeeeeeeeel. Remember what it's like to look at others through eyes of equality. Remember what it's like to feel free, to be in charge of your life, to feel alive. Remember what it's like to do something new and different.
The term "think outside the box" applies more today than it ever had in our modern history.
For starters (and I say for "starters" because this is only the beginning of a totally new journey of revamping how we live/think/believe/interact with one another), let's start utilizing our innate and oft neglected talents and gifts as a means of making a living for ourselves. While we go through this time of chaos, let us start realizing that a NEW community can be built upon each individual contributing their own gifts and talents as they see fit. And for all that is good in the world and the universe, WE NEED SOMETHING NEW.
Who needs these strip malls? Who needs to live in a town with 15 fast food restaurants, 5 office supply stores and endless big massive chain stores? How about instead we encourage--no, we command--local government and investors to invest in the INDIVIDUAL ENTREPRENEUR? How about instead of building yet another unnecessary store that sells cheap items from China we instead command local government and investors to utilize that space for the creation of indoor/outdoor community gardens and community centers? How about instead of letting all of these buildings remain vacant for ONE MORE MOMENT (nothing gets under my skin more than that absolute atrocity of a usable wasted resource) we command our local government to turn them into free and affordable housing for the homeless and poor?
Let's begin to talk about this thing called "money". Aren't we all tired of how it's been designed to control our lives???? Unless we can devise a system whereby everyone is given an equal amount every month, we need to come up with a system that is not based on money. I know, unpopular. Unheard of. To some, downright unfair.
And yet to those who would say that, I would say "Fine, keep things as they are. I'm looking for something different. Now if you would please step aside and give me the freedom to do just that." You like the current system? Fine. You can have it. I want, I need something different based on my belief system. And as I have long believed, there is never such an event as when only 1 or even 2 individuals share the same belief.
Let's organize. Let's talk. Now. Please, if anything I say resonates with you, don't just simply post a nice little accolade in the comment section. That is not what I'm after. This post is not about ego-stroking. It's me saying I have truly had enough and I wish deeply to speak with others who are like-minded only (there is no room in my heart, no space in my mind and no patience left in my soul to debate any of this or convince the current system worshippers and supporters) about relying on ONE ANOTHER instead of the government and big business and the banks to move us forward.
I AM READY.
For starters, if you happen to know of such a forming community, here are some of the skills/gifts/talents offered by my family: gardening, childcare, writing and editing, woodworking, basic home repair and construction, musical composition and performance, dog care/training/homemade dog food and treats, cooking, conflict resolution, sales
People, please. START THINKING AND FEELING AND DOING SOMETHING NEW AND DIFFERENT.
Go to that heart place and feeeeeeeeeel. Remember what it's like to look at others through eyes of equality. Remember what it's like to feel free, to be in charge of your life, to feel alive. Remember what it's like to do something new and different.
The term "think outside the box" applies more today than it ever had in our modern history.
For starters (and I say for "starters" because this is only the beginning of a totally new journey of revamping how we live/think/believe/interact with one another), let's start utilizing our innate and oft neglected talents and gifts as a means of making a living for ourselves. While we go through this time of chaos, let us start realizing that a NEW community can be built upon each individual contributing their own gifts and talents as they see fit. And for all that is good in the world and the universe, WE NEED SOMETHING NEW.
Who needs these strip malls? Who needs to live in a town with 15 fast food restaurants, 5 office supply stores and endless big massive chain stores? How about instead we encourage--no, we command--local government and investors to invest in the INDIVIDUAL ENTREPRENEUR? How about instead of building yet another unnecessary store that sells cheap items from China we instead command local government and investors to utilize that space for the creation of indoor/outdoor community gardens and community centers? How about instead of letting all of these buildings remain vacant for ONE MORE MOMENT (nothing gets under my skin more than that absolute atrocity of a usable wasted resource) we command our local government to turn them into free and affordable housing for the homeless and poor?
Let's begin to talk about this thing called "money". Aren't we all tired of how it's been designed to control our lives???? Unless we can devise a system whereby everyone is given an equal amount every month, we need to come up with a system that is not based on money. I know, unpopular. Unheard of. To some, downright unfair.
And yet to those who would say that, I would say "Fine, keep things as they are. I'm looking for something different. Now if you would please step aside and give me the freedom to do just that." You like the current system? Fine. You can have it. I want, I need something different based on my belief system. And as I have long believed, there is never such an event as when only 1 or even 2 individuals share the same belief.
Let's organize. Let's talk. Now. Please, if anything I say resonates with you, don't just simply post a nice little accolade in the comment section. That is not what I'm after. This post is not about ego-stroking. It's me saying I have truly had enough and I wish deeply to speak with others who are like-minded only (there is no room in my heart, no space in my mind and no patience left in my soul to debate any of this or convince the current system worshippers and supporters) about relying on ONE ANOTHER instead of the government and big business and the banks to move us forward.
I AM READY.
For starters, if you happen to know of such a forming community, here are some of the skills/gifts/talents offered by my family: gardening, childcare, writing and editing, woodworking, basic home repair and construction, musical composition and performance, dog care/training/homemade dog food and treats, cooking, conflict resolution, sales
3.19.2009
A Miracle.
The last couple of weeks, in particular the last 6 days, have been an emotional roller coaster for Mr. Nina and I. But there's very good news at the end of this particular journey.
A little over two weeks ago, our little dog and Mr. N had a near-collision in the kitchen. In trying to avoid my hub, little dog attempted to move quickly on the linoleum. In doing so, she seemed to injure herself for she came running back to my side immediately, shaking and whimpering. I found my husband and asked him what had happened. We decided to watch her and see how she moved around. She seemed fine after a few minutes. We even went for a nice long walk later in the day. The following day, she was showing signs of pain when walking up a step and climbing into her bed. Figuring it was likely a pulled muscle or other soft tissue injury, we decided to wait it out. Well, after a week, she was still showing signs of difficulty. So we took her in to the vet for a full exam, including blood work, urinalysis, and radiographs. At the time, the vet said it appeared to be some hip dysplasia setting in or perhaps a disc issue.
Well, you can imagine our shock and devestation when we returned 4 days later for a consultation and were told (and shown) that a large mass was found next to her spleen. We were horrified. We had options of course, including further testing. But given the location and size and the potential for a rupture as well as the fairly good chance it was not benign, we said "Take it out." So surgery was scheduled for the following Monday morning, first thing.
What a weekend. I did my best to remain calm and centered for our little dog, occupy myself with activity, but inside I was a wreck. As the phrase goes, I was worried sick. However, I was also intent as ever to see to it that she was ok. Somewhere within, I kept hearing "She's ok. She's fine." Was I just telling this to myself for reassurance or did I really somehow know this? I prayed like I haven't prayed in a long time. I was focused. I called upon Archangel Raphael to heal her. (I know some may think such a thing to be foolish. While I'm not religious, I do believe there is a Being of love and light who watches over our animals as protector and healer. For years I've felt that to be the Archangel Raphael and despite my change of belief in spiritual matters, I've held onto this belief.) I put her on prayer lists. I even kept open a book of mandala's I have and had it open to the page which displayed a mandala known for it's healing properties. I also spent time with her, laying my hands on her. Ultimately, I left it up to her to receive the healing.
Monday morning arrived. I was still a wreck inside. Handing her over to people who I knew were going to operate on her, trusting in them that she would be ok, was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I think Mr. Nina and I cried more during those days together than we ever have before.
Well, as they say, life is a mystery. The vet called before he stitched her up to let us know how stumped he was. That large mass he and the radiologist had seen, that had been pointed out to Mr. Nina and myself, was not there. It had disappeared. Vanished. What he did find was 3 little white lesions that had to be biopsied.
Those turned out to be benign.
I'm still amazed. Stunned. Elated! We've now given her the name St. Shilo.
As I spoke with the vet this afternoon, he again said in his 20 plus years as a vet, he's never misdiagnosed a mass. He and the radiologist have spoken at length as to how they both could have done such a thing. He's also never ever seen a mass only to open up an animal and have it not be there. He's calling it a mystery.
I'm calling it a miracle.
(p.s.-her exam showed no hip dysplasia or disc issues but she does have some arthritis in her shoulders and elbows. as far as the original injury, the vet's guessing that to be a muscular injury that will heal on it's own in time. the arthritis in her shoulders explains some of her struggles to jump up on the bed and couch the past year. if that's her only health issue, well we can live with that!! we've had her on joint supplements since she was a puppy and i've bought some turmeric that i will be adding to her food. i'm also looking into homeopathic remedies for pain and arthritis issues. a friend gave me some advice (thank u pugs!) and i also have an excellent book written by a vet on holistic pet care.)
A little over two weeks ago, our little dog and Mr. N had a near-collision in the kitchen. In trying to avoid my hub, little dog attempted to move quickly on the linoleum. In doing so, she seemed to injure herself for she came running back to my side immediately, shaking and whimpering. I found my husband and asked him what had happened. We decided to watch her and see how she moved around. She seemed fine after a few minutes. We even went for a nice long walk later in the day. The following day, she was showing signs of pain when walking up a step and climbing into her bed. Figuring it was likely a pulled muscle or other soft tissue injury, we decided to wait it out. Well, after a week, she was still showing signs of difficulty. So we took her in to the vet for a full exam, including blood work, urinalysis, and radiographs. At the time, the vet said it appeared to be some hip dysplasia setting in or perhaps a disc issue.
Well, you can imagine our shock and devestation when we returned 4 days later for a consultation and were told (and shown) that a large mass was found next to her spleen. We were horrified. We had options of course, including further testing. But given the location and size and the potential for a rupture as well as the fairly good chance it was not benign, we said "Take it out." So surgery was scheduled for the following Monday morning, first thing.
What a weekend. I did my best to remain calm and centered for our little dog, occupy myself with activity, but inside I was a wreck. As the phrase goes, I was worried sick. However, I was also intent as ever to see to it that she was ok. Somewhere within, I kept hearing "She's ok. She's fine." Was I just telling this to myself for reassurance or did I really somehow know this? I prayed like I haven't prayed in a long time. I was focused. I called upon Archangel Raphael to heal her. (I know some may think such a thing to be foolish. While I'm not religious, I do believe there is a Being of love and light who watches over our animals as protector and healer. For years I've felt that to be the Archangel Raphael and despite my change of belief in spiritual matters, I've held onto this belief.) I put her on prayer lists. I even kept open a book of mandala's I have and had it open to the page which displayed a mandala known for it's healing properties. I also spent time with her, laying my hands on her. Ultimately, I left it up to her to receive the healing.
Monday morning arrived. I was still a wreck inside. Handing her over to people who I knew were going to operate on her, trusting in them that she would be ok, was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I think Mr. Nina and I cried more during those days together than we ever have before.
Well, as they say, life is a mystery. The vet called before he stitched her up to let us know how stumped he was. That large mass he and the radiologist had seen, that had been pointed out to Mr. Nina and myself, was not there. It had disappeared. Vanished. What he did find was 3 little white lesions that had to be biopsied.
Those turned out to be benign.
I'm still amazed. Stunned. Elated! We've now given her the name St. Shilo.
As I spoke with the vet this afternoon, he again said in his 20 plus years as a vet, he's never misdiagnosed a mass. He and the radiologist have spoken at length as to how they both could have done such a thing. He's also never ever seen a mass only to open up an animal and have it not be there. He's calling it a mystery.
I'm calling it a miracle.
(p.s.-her exam showed no hip dysplasia or disc issues but she does have some arthritis in her shoulders and elbows. as far as the original injury, the vet's guessing that to be a muscular injury that will heal on it's own in time. the arthritis in her shoulders explains some of her struggles to jump up on the bed and couch the past year. if that's her only health issue, well we can live with that!! we've had her on joint supplements since she was a puppy and i've bought some turmeric that i will be adding to her food. i'm also looking into homeopathic remedies for pain and arthritis issues. a friend gave me some advice (thank u pugs!) and i also have an excellent book written by a vet on holistic pet care.)
3.08.2009
Another City H2O Increase
Our water bill increased another 8%. We called 'em up given we were encouraged to call with any questions or concerns about the increase. It was the usual bullshit politically correct speaking mantra these people are brainwashed into spewing to a concerned public. Their monkey speak this time: "The city authorized the increase."
"I am the city. I didn't approve of this."
"The city authorized the increase."
Don't you have anything else on your little script to offer me?
Oh yes, costs are up. Boo fucking hoo. For once, eat the costs instead of passing them onto the consumer, especially in an economic depression. What the fuck is wrong with you people?
Oh, that's right. You have no conscience. Your soul has been sucked away by years of supporting the system. Your heart completely shut off to any sense of decency and fairness. Kindness. Understanding.
A person at a local business told us to conserve more upon hearing my gripe.
WTF? That's your answer? My cost goes up so it's up to ME to find a way to bring it down? I just shot her a glare, grabbed my bag and walked out. Clueless moronic fool.
IS THIS WHAT WE HAVE COME TO? IS THIS HOW FUCKING STUPID AND DETACHED WE ARE? HAVE WE REALLY COME TO A PLACE WHERE IT'S STANDARD TO PUT THE FOCUS OF STRUGGLE ON THE VICTIM INSTEAD OF THE ONE DOING THE VICTIMIZING?
I wonder how many of us who used to think "why am I here" are now asking "why did I come here".
"I am the city. I didn't approve of this."
"The city authorized the increase."
Don't you have anything else on your little script to offer me?
Oh yes, costs are up. Boo fucking hoo. For once, eat the costs instead of passing them onto the consumer, especially in an economic depression. What the fuck is wrong with you people?
Oh, that's right. You have no conscience. Your soul has been sucked away by years of supporting the system. Your heart completely shut off to any sense of decency and fairness. Kindness. Understanding.
A person at a local business told us to conserve more upon hearing my gripe.
WTF? That's your answer? My cost goes up so it's up to ME to find a way to bring it down? I just shot her a glare, grabbed my bag and walked out. Clueless moronic fool.
IS THIS WHAT WE HAVE COME TO? IS THIS HOW FUCKING STUPID AND DETACHED WE ARE? HAVE WE REALLY COME TO A PLACE WHERE IT'S STANDARD TO PUT THE FOCUS OF STRUGGLE ON THE VICTIM INSTEAD OF THE ONE DOING THE VICTIMIZING?
I wonder how many of us who used to think "why am I here" are now asking "why did I come here".
3.07.2009
Power To The People: "Pray The Devil Back To Hell"
Who says a committed, organized group of individuals, women no less, cannot, through non-violent means, put an end to corrupt politics and war?
"Pray the Devil Back to Hell chronicles the remarkable story of the courageous Liberian women who came together to end a bloody civil war and bring peace to their shattered country. Thousands of women — ordinary mothers, grandmothers, aunts and daughters, both Christian and Muslim — came together to pray for peace and then staged a silent protest outside of the Presidential Palace. Armed only with white T-shirts and the courage of their convictions, they demanded a resolution to the country’s civil war. Their actions were a critical element in bringing about a agreement during the stalled peace talks. A story of sacrifice, unity and transcendence, Pray the Devil Back to Hell honors the strength and perseverence of the women of Liberia. Inspiring, uplifting, and most of all motivating, it is a compelling testimony of how grassroots activism can alter the history of nations."
Click on the "about the film" link to learn more about the women leaders of this movement. I am very much anticipating the release of this DVD for home viewing.
"Pray the Devil Back to Hell chronicles the remarkable story of the courageous Liberian women who came together to end a bloody civil war and bring peace to their shattered country. Thousands of women — ordinary mothers, grandmothers, aunts and daughters, both Christian and Muslim — came together to pray for peace and then staged a silent protest outside of the Presidential Palace. Armed only with white T-shirts and the courage of their convictions, they demanded a resolution to the country’s civil war. Their actions were a critical element in bringing about a agreement during the stalled peace talks. A story of sacrifice, unity and transcendence, Pray the Devil Back to Hell honors the strength and perseverence of the women of Liberia. Inspiring, uplifting, and most of all motivating, it is a compelling testimony of how grassroots activism can alter the history of nations."
Click on the "about the film" link to learn more about the women leaders of this movement. I am very much anticipating the release of this DVD for home viewing.
3.06.2009
Homemade Beauty Products
I've been gathering some recipes for natural, homemade beauty products. The older I get, the more natural I want and the more self-sustaining I wish to be. I've already made the switch to mineral make-up, which I love and would like to learn how to make my own someday. However, that is quite involved so for now, I'm sticking to homemade shampoos, conditioners and lip balms. The internet is a wealth of information for such things. I was surprised at how easy it is to make your own lip balm. You just need some beeswax (1 T grated), carrier oil (2 T--almond or olive) and a vitamin E capsule (for natural preserving). You put that all on the stove on low until the wax melts, then you can add in essential oils (note: vanilla is VERY expensive so I'm opting for peppermint and maybe sweet orange and/or cinnamon). I'm still at a bit of a loss for coloring. I read you can add some henna powder or beet juice but that's about all I could find. For a really natural lip gloss recipe, you simply heat 1 tablespoon of almond oil, 10 fresh cranberries and 1 tsp. of honey. Heat until the mix begins to boil, stir and mash the cranberries. Then let stand for 5 minutes. Strain. Stir and allow to cool then put into little containers.
I've been wanting to make my own shampoo for some time. I found a recipe where you add 4 oz. of castille soap (plant based soap--any scent) along with a mix of herbs such as nettles, sage and rosemary that have been made into a tea (2 cups boiling water) and strained. However, lately I've heard about women bypassing shampoo altogether and simply using conditioner with some added brown sugar (which is a mild cleansing agent that does not strip the hair of natural oils) or baking soda (which is an excellent agent for removing build up and in my opinion, should only be used sparingly. Too much and you will look like you have a birds nest on top of your head.) The conditioner will remove basic grime and dirt. I've found even the most natural of shampoo's strip my hair.
My hair is weird. It's heavy and tends to be flat on top while poofing out on the sides. I have to style it somewhat if I don't want to look like a dork. I also have a lot of it. I have to get it thinned out every few months and even at that, I still have a lot of hair left. When my stylist is done, she always looks on the floor and comments how there resides enough hair for one person. Some of it is coarse, but most of it is fine. As a result, it's a real pain at times. Thankfully I have a natural wave that keeps it from being a complete pain in my a&&. Today I decided to just use conditioner. The result? My hair was more manageable, softer and had more body.
Sometimes, when I remember, I'll add an apple cider vinegar rinse. I think it's something like 1/4 cup of vinegar to 1 cup of warm water. About the only difference I noticed with this was my hair was a bit shinier. I've also read where stale beer (cheap will do--don't want to waste the good import) adds a lot of body, although I have yet to try that. Here's a recipe I found for a homemade hair conditioner: 1 mashed avacado added to some coconut milk (I'm also thinking hemp milk would work) until it's shampoo consistency. Comb through hair and let sit 10-15 minutes. Rinse.
I have this blend of pure essential oils blended in with coconut, hemp and olive oils that I use now and then. It's a bit of a nightmare to wash out though so I don't use it that often even though the ingredients are so wonderful for the hair. I bought it from Uncle Harry's (see the link under my faves). It was only around $6 for a 4 oz jar which is a bargain.
I have also found a recipe for homemade hairspray. I haven't tried this one yet. It looks simple enough. You chop up 1 orange, place in a pot of 2 cups of water. Boil until half the liquid remains. Remove. Cool. Strain. Add 1 oz of rubbing alcohol if you wish to keep it in the cupboard otherwise store it in the refrigerator. Add more h2o if the liquid is too sticky. (Use a lemon instead of an orange if you hair is oily.)
I found a website that carries a lot of these ingredients (waxes, essential oils, carrier oils, liquid soaps, herbs). Mountain Rose Herbs. Great prices and very green practices.
I've been wanting to make my own shampoo for some time. I found a recipe where you add 4 oz. of castille soap (plant based soap--any scent) along with a mix of herbs such as nettles, sage and rosemary that have been made into a tea (2 cups boiling water) and strained. However, lately I've heard about women bypassing shampoo altogether and simply using conditioner with some added brown sugar (which is a mild cleansing agent that does not strip the hair of natural oils) or baking soda (which is an excellent agent for removing build up and in my opinion, should only be used sparingly. Too much and you will look like you have a birds nest on top of your head.) The conditioner will remove basic grime and dirt. I've found even the most natural of shampoo's strip my hair.
My hair is weird. It's heavy and tends to be flat on top while poofing out on the sides. I have to style it somewhat if I don't want to look like a dork. I also have a lot of it. I have to get it thinned out every few months and even at that, I still have a lot of hair left. When my stylist is done, she always looks on the floor and comments how there resides enough hair for one person. Some of it is coarse, but most of it is fine. As a result, it's a real pain at times. Thankfully I have a natural wave that keeps it from being a complete pain in my a&&. Today I decided to just use conditioner. The result? My hair was more manageable, softer and had more body.
Sometimes, when I remember, I'll add an apple cider vinegar rinse. I think it's something like 1/4 cup of vinegar to 1 cup of warm water. About the only difference I noticed with this was my hair was a bit shinier. I've also read where stale beer (cheap will do--don't want to waste the good import) adds a lot of body, although I have yet to try that. Here's a recipe I found for a homemade hair conditioner: 1 mashed avacado added to some coconut milk (I'm also thinking hemp milk would work) until it's shampoo consistency. Comb through hair and let sit 10-15 minutes. Rinse.
I have this blend of pure essential oils blended in with coconut, hemp and olive oils that I use now and then. It's a bit of a nightmare to wash out though so I don't use it that often even though the ingredients are so wonderful for the hair. I bought it from Uncle Harry's (see the link under my faves). It was only around $6 for a 4 oz jar which is a bargain.
I have also found a recipe for homemade hairspray. I haven't tried this one yet. It looks simple enough. You chop up 1 orange, place in a pot of 2 cups of water. Boil until half the liquid remains. Remove. Cool. Strain. Add 1 oz of rubbing alcohol if you wish to keep it in the cupboard otherwise store it in the refrigerator. Add more h2o if the liquid is too sticky. (Use a lemon instead of an orange if you hair is oily.)
I found a website that carries a lot of these ingredients (waxes, essential oils, carrier oils, liquid soaps, herbs). Mountain Rose Herbs. Great prices and very green practices.
3.02.2009
Why...
Why is it when someone challenges things such as human-caused global climate change and the legitimacy of Obama's citizenship they are automatically labeled a right-wing nut?
Why is it when someone challenges the previous administration's love affair with war, they're labeled a hippie liberal commie?
Why is it when someone speaks of universal health care, they're labeled a radical socialist?
Why would one of my visitors, when finding my blog, google the question "do food banks take expired food items?" What kind of a question is that and why on earth would you think it's ok to give expired food to the poor? If you wouldn't give it to your family, don't think it's ok to give it to the needy. Take a few dollars, go buy some fresh food and deliver that instead.
Why do most people believe in a god of some sort?
That being said, why do many not believe in the idea of alien craft in the skies and/or other life forms on other planets? (Here's a little goodie: ancient drawings in caves show flying saucer type craft and alien looking beings as being worshipped as gods.)
Why do we smile when we want to cry?
Why do we laugh when we want to scream?
Why do we cover our pain and fear with nasty words?
Why am I asking so many questions?
Why are you reading this?
Why have I been such a bitch lately??
Why is it when someone challenges the previous administration's love affair with war, they're labeled a hippie liberal commie?
Why is it when someone speaks of universal health care, they're labeled a radical socialist?
Why would one of my visitors, when finding my blog, google the question "do food banks take expired food items?" What kind of a question is that and why on earth would you think it's ok to give expired food to the poor? If you wouldn't give it to your family, don't think it's ok to give it to the needy. Take a few dollars, go buy some fresh food and deliver that instead.
Why do most people believe in a god of some sort?
That being said, why do many not believe in the idea of alien craft in the skies and/or other life forms on other planets? (Here's a little goodie: ancient drawings in caves show flying saucer type craft and alien looking beings as being worshipped as gods.)
Why do we smile when we want to cry?
Why do we laugh when we want to scream?
Why do we cover our pain and fear with nasty words?
Why am I asking so many questions?
Why are you reading this?
Why have I been such a bitch lately??
Hi. My Name Is Oprah. I Tell People How To Get It When I Don't Get It Myself.
If I hear or see one more word of advice from wealthy elitist television personalities telling me how to go without and how to save... Dr. Phil, the man obsessed with the baby making machine while totally not seeing her obvious narcissism and manipulative behavior, who wasted more of television airtime by being on The Doctor's Show today and continuing this b.s. conversation (which btw must be easy to get on a show that employs your son as the Executive Producer, which, btw must be easy to ride on the coattails of your father and land your own damn show in your early 20's) has been running episodes on saving and living with less. And today, yet again, Oprah, thinking she's part of the "regular people", aired a show titled The Living With Less Experiment.
That's sorta like god telling the people of Gaza to do things differently to be safe in that war zone while the SOB resides safely in the world of spirit and energy.
Here's a little experiment for you, Miss O. Call it an "it" gift from me to you. I won't even charge you for it. Can YOU live with only one home? Can YOU live without your chef and cooking staff? Can YOU live without your gardners? Can YOU live without the limo drivers, the housekeepers and the wasteful gala's and evening's out at obscenely overly-priced restaurant's that often offer pretty views overlooking pretty parks that house many of the areas homeless? Can YOU live without having on your show one more god damn pretentious elitist celebrity without putting the celebrity up on some dumb ass pedestal, without going gaga or encouraging the audience to go gaga?
Can you?
DO YOU GET "IT" YET?
We the "regular" people are fed up with folks in your category (from tv pundits to government figureheads) flaunting your wealth while trying to tell us that WE MUST GO WITHOUT.
FUCK YOU. YOU go without and share some of that god damn wealth you've been taking advantage of due to the filtering upwards of that wealth. Tell the already struggling to go without even more? FUCK YOU.
Fuck you.
That's sorta like god telling the people of Gaza to do things differently to be safe in that war zone while the SOB resides safely in the world of spirit and energy.
Here's a little experiment for you, Miss O. Call it an "it" gift from me to you. I won't even charge you for it. Can YOU live with only one home? Can YOU live without your chef and cooking staff? Can YOU live without your gardners? Can YOU live without the limo drivers, the housekeepers and the wasteful gala's and evening's out at obscenely overly-priced restaurant's that often offer pretty views overlooking pretty parks that house many of the areas homeless? Can YOU live without having on your show one more god damn pretentious elitist celebrity without putting the celebrity up on some dumb ass pedestal, without going gaga or encouraging the audience to go gaga?
Can you?
DO YOU GET "IT" YET?
We the "regular" people are fed up with folks in your category (from tv pundits to government figureheads) flaunting your wealth while trying to tell us that WE MUST GO WITHOUT.
FUCK YOU. YOU go without and share some of that god damn wealth you've been taking advantage of due to the filtering upwards of that wealth. Tell the already struggling to go without even more? FUCK YOU.
Fuck you.
3.01.2009
Overwhelming Frustration and Citizen Apathy
I've been having these itching fits all over my body lately. My hands, legs, back, neck. It isn't just about a body saying "itch me" but rather, a mind saying STOP THIS FUCKING INSANITY I NEED SOMETHING DIFFERENT TODAY. NOW. N O W. I am irritated, both inside and out.
I hide this state of mind and emotion most of the time, usually with a smile and a calm outer demeanor. However, within, I am a churning storm of thoughts and emotions that have simply become overwhelmed with the system and the braindead idiotic sheep-like mentality that exists. As such, I feel this deep loneliness and this utter lack of connection despite trying to convince myself 'we're all connected'. At some level, yes that is likely true. However, at the human level and all of this bullshit human stupidity being played out, no. I do not feel a connection to any of it.
My ideas are out there. Way out there. This past week I've been presenting the concept of a society that isn't focused on money but rather, on the well-being of the people and when that is employed, the well-being of the planet naturally follows. While there has been some interest, overall the opinion has been "money is here to stay".
One person asked me "would this idea be forced on us?" I just looked at her, wondering why she would say such a thing given the current system is forced on us. When I said "no of course not" she said "ok, whew!" and laughed. It was then that I said "even if it was, how would that differ than what is forced on us today?" She just looked at me.
D U H.
I don't know. I know I'm hard on people at times. I'm hard on myself. I've longed for something new since I was a child. Even as a little girl I hated money. I hated the focus it received. I hated that it was more important than I was. I despised the stress it created in my own home, causing unnecessary disharmony. I hated war. I couldn't understand the desire to want to control a person to the extent that picking up a weapon and threatening their demise lest they comply.
All over pieces of fucking green paper with ink and numbers. Completely worthless in and of itself. And yet worshipped and given more importance, more credence, more value than the heart, mind and soul of a person, an animal, a planet. This disease is within every one of us to varying degrees.
Today, while I still don't understand the previous (despite understanding the conditions that create such dysfunctional thought), more than anything what I do not understand is this on-going need to support what is. Oh sure there's talk about growing more of our own food and developing more alternative forms of powering our lives, all of which are wonderful. And yet, there's still this worship of money.
Yesterday I was reading one of those new age fluffy newspapers. Mr. N brought it home and so I thought to browse through it. I used to eat this shit up until something in me said these folks were missing half the boat. In one piece I read, Caroline Myss was speaking of our sense of entitlement, how we all have this belief that we are entitled to the big home and all of that stuff. How we live in fear of lack. And yet she stopped short of actually diving into this issue further (these folks are famous for this). She failed to talk about the need for something different--a system where money is not at the heart but rather, the heart of the people is. She's still behind the support of an ancient, archaic system that creates the very lack she claims is all in our heads! It isn't just our thoughts doing this! WHY DO THESE PEOPLE FAIL TO SEE THIS? Why likely if they were to see this, their big-name for-profit money whoring publishing companies would stop supporting them. 'Tis why today I think "take that starry-eyed fluffy phoniness and shove it".
Love for all. Spiritual awakenings. MY ASS. Ain't gonna happen as long as money is at the center of our lives.
So today I now ask myself, what do I want to do? Where do I find such a place already in existance? I don't have the mental energy to invest into trying to convince others of such a society. I've simply had this feeling for about 40 years now that has said: "this place is fucked up. i want something different. i need something different."
Today I know, more and more, I can't fake it anymore.
I hide this state of mind and emotion most of the time, usually with a smile and a calm outer demeanor. However, within, I am a churning storm of thoughts and emotions that have simply become overwhelmed with the system and the braindead idiotic sheep-like mentality that exists. As such, I feel this deep loneliness and this utter lack of connection despite trying to convince myself 'we're all connected'. At some level, yes that is likely true. However, at the human level and all of this bullshit human stupidity being played out, no. I do not feel a connection to any of it.
My ideas are out there. Way out there. This past week I've been presenting the concept of a society that isn't focused on money but rather, on the well-being of the people and when that is employed, the well-being of the planet naturally follows. While there has been some interest, overall the opinion has been "money is here to stay".
One person asked me "would this idea be forced on us?" I just looked at her, wondering why she would say such a thing given the current system is forced on us. When I said "no of course not" she said "ok, whew!" and laughed. It was then that I said "even if it was, how would that differ than what is forced on us today?" She just looked at me.
D U H.
I don't know. I know I'm hard on people at times. I'm hard on myself. I've longed for something new since I was a child. Even as a little girl I hated money. I hated the focus it received. I hated that it was more important than I was. I despised the stress it created in my own home, causing unnecessary disharmony. I hated war. I couldn't understand the desire to want to control a person to the extent that picking up a weapon and threatening their demise lest they comply.
All over pieces of fucking green paper with ink and numbers. Completely worthless in and of itself. And yet worshipped and given more importance, more credence, more value than the heart, mind and soul of a person, an animal, a planet. This disease is within every one of us to varying degrees.
Today, while I still don't understand the previous (despite understanding the conditions that create such dysfunctional thought), more than anything what I do not understand is this on-going need to support what is. Oh sure there's talk about growing more of our own food and developing more alternative forms of powering our lives, all of which are wonderful. And yet, there's still this worship of money.
Yesterday I was reading one of those new age fluffy newspapers. Mr. N brought it home and so I thought to browse through it. I used to eat this shit up until something in me said these folks were missing half the boat. In one piece I read, Caroline Myss was speaking of our sense of entitlement, how we all have this belief that we are entitled to the big home and all of that stuff. How we live in fear of lack. And yet she stopped short of actually diving into this issue further (these folks are famous for this). She failed to talk about the need for something different--a system where money is not at the heart but rather, the heart of the people is. She's still behind the support of an ancient, archaic system that creates the very lack she claims is all in our heads! It isn't just our thoughts doing this! WHY DO THESE PEOPLE FAIL TO SEE THIS? Why likely if they were to see this, their big-name for-profit money whoring publishing companies would stop supporting them. 'Tis why today I think "take that starry-eyed fluffy phoniness and shove it".
Love for all. Spiritual awakenings. MY ASS. Ain't gonna happen as long as money is at the center of our lives.
So today I now ask myself, what do I want to do? Where do I find such a place already in existance? I don't have the mental energy to invest into trying to convince others of such a society. I've simply had this feeling for about 40 years now that has said: "this place is fucked up. i want something different. i need something different."
Today I know, more and more, I can't fake it anymore.
2.28.2009
Auto Mechanics 101
The car is currently at our mechanics shop. It's been running rough and sluggish, stalling now and then. Last week it decided to do this on a day Mr. Nina was in the throes of this virus, leaving him stranded, the car in need of a tow.
At first they weren't sure what was wrong with the poor thing. It started up fine for them and showed no issues of sluggish handling or stalling, which caused me to think car's are like children. They act up for mom and dad but behave perfectly for others.
But I digress.
So while the "experts" were busy trying to determine what mechanical defect was causing the symptoms, I went on a several hour journey into basic auto mechanics, namely the ignition system. I learned what a distributor is, what it does (sends the spark to the right spark plug). I learned about the rotor, the cap and the coils inside the cap. I learned about spark plug wires. I learned about when to replace these things (something, aside from the plugs, I've never had done). After a few hours I had it narrowed down to two potential causes: The PGM (that stands for programmed--I think it makes me look cool to abbreviate it though like the professionals) Fuel Injector Relay (also called the Main Relay) or something in the distributor.
Awhile later, the shop called. They had it narrowed down to two potential causes. And what would those be?
Either the Main Relay or the Distributor.
Well, there ya go.
I said I concurred.
They leaned towards it being the Main Relay only given when hooked up to some do-hookey (technical term--ignore the need to understand what it is), it showed that there was no crank.
Well, I wasn't satisfied. Something told me that wasn't the only issue, especially since I had already replaced the Main Relay 10 years ago and at the time, the symptoms the car was giving me at the time was not the same symptoms we had been experiencing lately, certainly not in the number of them. So, I asked if they planned on checking the distributor as well.
No, they hadn't planned on doing that, which I found odd.
So I said "do it". They did.
And they called back 10 minutes later and said the coils inside were bad.
I also told "You were right. You're the woman!"
I asked if they were hiring.
He laughed.
I said I wasn't joking. I nailed the problem before they did.
Sounding embarassed, he stuttered "uh, well yeah, you did, didn't you?"
So we hung up.
Something though told me to keep researching. Oh god. No. No more research, my brain screamed. Well, I ignored the screaming and went back to work and found something interesting while re-reading some of my original material: When changing the plugs (which we were also having done), it's also important to change the wires, for defective/old wires can lead to the car running sluggish and (in)conveniently stalling on occasion.
A ha! I thought. That sounds precisely what our car has been doing! They also need to change not only the plugs but the wires, too. I ran to the phone to make the call but realized it was after 5pm and the shop was closed. So it got me thinking. Why wouldn't they suggest it could be the wires as well? I described the symptoms with such detail that was sure to impress any mechanic. I had the sounds the engine made down to precision from the chug chug to the poof poof.
And yet here these dudes were going after the most labor-intensive, expensive fix as their first choice?
Can anyone say G R E E D?
Well anyway, the car's getting fixed nonetheless. It needs the new distributor and relay. Mr. Nina and I will replace the wires as I also learned how to do that during my research. Same some bucks. Last night we aired our grievances to one another about these folks and decided not to return. I added, in exasperation, "It would be wonderful to connect with someone we know who knows how to work on cars."
Sometimes such moments product quick results, for just this afternoon, whilst some friends were visiting, we were informed, after sharing our story, that the male in the group had extensive experience in working on cars.
"Next time you need a car repair, give me a call," he said.
A very nice offer.
And one that I am sure to take him up on, even if I do decide to do my own research along the way.
At first they weren't sure what was wrong with the poor thing. It started up fine for them and showed no issues of sluggish handling or stalling, which caused me to think car's are like children. They act up for mom and dad but behave perfectly for others.
But I digress.
So while the "experts" were busy trying to determine what mechanical defect was causing the symptoms, I went on a several hour journey into basic auto mechanics, namely the ignition system. I learned what a distributor is, what it does (sends the spark to the right spark plug). I learned about the rotor, the cap and the coils inside the cap. I learned about spark plug wires. I learned about when to replace these things (something, aside from the plugs, I've never had done). After a few hours I had it narrowed down to two potential causes: The PGM (that stands for programmed--I think it makes me look cool to abbreviate it though like the professionals) Fuel Injector Relay (also called the Main Relay) or something in the distributor.
Awhile later, the shop called. They had it narrowed down to two potential causes. And what would those be?
Either the Main Relay or the Distributor.
Well, there ya go.
I said I concurred.
They leaned towards it being the Main Relay only given when hooked up to some do-hookey (technical term--ignore the need to understand what it is), it showed that there was no crank.
Well, I wasn't satisfied. Something told me that wasn't the only issue, especially since I had already replaced the Main Relay 10 years ago and at the time, the symptoms the car was giving me at the time was not the same symptoms we had been experiencing lately, certainly not in the number of them. So, I asked if they planned on checking the distributor as well.
No, they hadn't planned on doing that, which I found odd.
So I said "do it". They did.
And they called back 10 minutes later and said the coils inside were bad.
I also told "You were right. You're the woman!"
I asked if they were hiring.
He laughed.
I said I wasn't joking. I nailed the problem before they did.
Sounding embarassed, he stuttered "uh, well yeah, you did, didn't you?"
So we hung up.
Something though told me to keep researching. Oh god. No. No more research, my brain screamed. Well, I ignored the screaming and went back to work and found something interesting while re-reading some of my original material: When changing the plugs (which we were also having done), it's also important to change the wires, for defective/old wires can lead to the car running sluggish and (in)conveniently stalling on occasion.
A ha! I thought. That sounds precisely what our car has been doing! They also need to change not only the plugs but the wires, too. I ran to the phone to make the call but realized it was after 5pm and the shop was closed. So it got me thinking. Why wouldn't they suggest it could be the wires as well? I described the symptoms with such detail that was sure to impress any mechanic. I had the sounds the engine made down to precision from the chug chug to the poof poof.
And yet here these dudes were going after the most labor-intensive, expensive fix as their first choice?
Can anyone say G R E E D?
Well anyway, the car's getting fixed nonetheless. It needs the new distributor and relay. Mr. Nina and I will replace the wires as I also learned how to do that during my research. Same some bucks. Last night we aired our grievances to one another about these folks and decided not to return. I added, in exasperation, "It would be wonderful to connect with someone we know who knows how to work on cars."
Sometimes such moments product quick results, for just this afternoon, whilst some friends were visiting, we were informed, after sharing our story, that the male in the group had extensive experience in working on cars.
"Next time you need a car repair, give me a call," he said.
A very nice offer.
And one that I am sure to take him up on, even if I do decide to do my own research along the way.
Chinese Investors Buying Up Foreclosed Properties
Wealthy Chinese Taking Advantage Of Slumping Economy
What's going on? A bit of capitalist backscratching? American companies use the poor of China to make products on the cheap while Chinese Investors take advantage of destitute Americans?
BEIJING (AP) - While China's ultra-rich have been buying property in the U.S. for years, the buying tours are new, made attractive by still-rising Chinese income levels and American real estate prices that have been falling for two and a half years. More than 100 Chinese buyers have joined such tours since late 2008, according to Chen Hang, the China-born vice president of real estate at Fortune Group. The Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, company shows foreclosed commercial property to Chinese buyers.
What's going on? A bit of capitalist backscratching? American companies use the poor of China to make products on the cheap while Chinese Investors take advantage of destitute Americans?
BEIJING (AP) - While China's ultra-rich have been buying property in the U.S. for years, the buying tours are new, made attractive by still-rising Chinese income levels and American real estate prices that have been falling for two and a half years. More than 100 Chinese buyers have joined such tours since late 2008, according to Chen Hang, the China-born vice president of real estate at Fortune Group. The Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, company shows foreclosed commercial property to Chinese buyers.
Squatting: History Set To Repeat Itself?
I found this article in the archives of the New York Times. Dated April 6, 1889, it shares the story of some Iowa squatters who, in defending what they defined as their land, fired upon U.S. Marshalls. Makes me wonder if we will be seeing more of the same as more homes are foreclosed upon and people, fed up with the (utterly dysfunctional and archaic) particular belief system that dictates who gets to own land and who doesn't, will rise up and affirm: NO MORE.
That aside, it's an interesting read. Gotta love the journalistic style of the time.
That aside, it's an interesting read. Gotta love the journalistic style of the time.
2.26.2009
Strange Contrail In Corvallis Skies
This was originally published in the G.T. on January 31st. It's something I've been meaning to post but you know the saying. The road to something something is paved with good intentions or something like that..... Anyway, my thanks to Mr. Nina for finding the article and forwarding it to me.
On Thursday, January 29th, 2009, a circular loop de loop formation contrail was seen over the NW skies of Corvallis. The theories ranged from a military plane, to a UFO, to a jet plane to the wicked witch of the east. According to the article, someone who works at a local business saw what looked to be a jet plane in the sky at the time. And according to a website, a jet flight out of Boeing Field in Seattle showed the flight being in the area at the time before returning back North. However, looking at the photo, it seems highly unlikely that a jet plane could pull off such a maneuver. I don't know if the wings could tolerate that kind of stress.
But what do I know. I'm not an engineer. Check out the piece FMI. And if it strikes you, post your own theory. I don't really have one, although I do like the idea about it being the wicked witch of the east. Might be a good idea to find out what Sarah Palin was up to that day.
On Thursday, January 29th, 2009, a circular loop de loop formation contrail was seen over the NW skies of Corvallis. The theories ranged from a military plane, to a UFO, to a jet plane to the wicked witch of the east. According to the article, someone who works at a local business saw what looked to be a jet plane in the sky at the time. And according to a website, a jet flight out of Boeing Field in Seattle showed the flight being in the area at the time before returning back North. However, looking at the photo, it seems highly unlikely that a jet plane could pull off such a maneuver. I don't know if the wings could tolerate that kind of stress.
But what do I know. I'm not an engineer. Check out the piece FMI. And if it strikes you, post your own theory. I don't really have one, although I do like the idea about it being the wicked witch of the east. Might be a good idea to find out what Sarah Palin was up to that day.
STFU Of The Day Award
Oprah, Miss Queen of "I just so often don't get it" aired a program on the growing number of tent cities in America. While I am grateful she reported on this unnecessary situation, it was what she said at the end that made me think "stfu". She said let the showing of these families be a reminder for us to reach out and help those in similar situations.
The woman has numerous homes. Does she open up any of them when not in use to the homeless?
Nope.
Therefore, she receives the "STFU" of the day award.
The woman has numerous homes. Does she open up any of them when not in use to the homeless?
Nope.
Therefore, she receives the "STFU" of the day award.
2.25.2009
On Being Sickie-Pooh
I'm borrowing the phrase "sickie-pooh" from my dad, a term he used during my childhood when one of us in the household wasn't feeling well. It was I who was sick, uh, "sickie-pooh" late last week and into this week, today being the first day I felt human enough to venture out. It was sort of like coming out of a cave, seeing the light of day for the first time after a winter's hibernation.
You walk out. Hey, the world's still here, you think, shielding your eyes from that old friend the sunshine. Everything seems more vibrant. And louder.
In truth, the only reason I ventured out today was due to the fact that Mr. Nina is now sick with the same virus. He's just entering the forest. I, on the other hand, am coming out of the woods, although I'm still carrying the bags of fatigue and that ragged cough with me (the cough that causes people to look at you with a sense concern--for themselves).
When I'm sick, I take things for granted. Things like being able to sleep through the night, being able to breathe with my mouth closed. My appetite. Until yesterday, I didn't have one, so I had to force myself to eat. My diet consisted mostly of water, tea and soup. Last night though, my stomach said NEED MORE so I added ham, biscuits and a root beer float (not together, mind you). And even at that, the tummy still said "NEED MORE".
It was a joy to eat.
I used to hear men and women experience illness differently. I didn't believe this until I married this husband of mine. When I'm sick, I pretty much just want to be left alone. I ride out the storm until I am well again, doing my best to avoid the pharmaceuticals (other than the vap-o-rub). Mr. Nina on the other hand has a little issue with acceptance. He won't admit the virus has won until he's well into the feeling-like-crap stage. Until that time he'll push himself, insist on doing everything himself, butt in when I'm making him something to insist 'he can do it he's not sick'.
And then once the virus has announced "I'm here to stay white man", he goes into the whine mode.
Endless phrases like "honey I don't feeeeeeeeeel well" and "I haaaaaate being sick" are heard. And worse even it is when it is a virus I too have had, for then I am asked endless questions like "honey when you had this did your eyes water" and "honey when you had this did your ears hurt".
On and on and on.
I was tapped out on patience today so I replied to those questions with "I already answered that 50 times yesterday. The same answer applies again today."
I know, takes longer to say such things instead of a simple "yes".
Throughout it all though, there has been one hero in the household, one being who has withstood the coughing and sneezing, the moaning and complaining with a quiet patience not seen in people. This sweet little being has agreed to put aside some of her needs so that the two of us can heal.
That sweet little being, that hero, would be our dog.
Ruuuff.
You walk out. Hey, the world's still here, you think, shielding your eyes from that old friend the sunshine. Everything seems more vibrant. And louder.
In truth, the only reason I ventured out today was due to the fact that Mr. Nina is now sick with the same virus. He's just entering the forest. I, on the other hand, am coming out of the woods, although I'm still carrying the bags of fatigue and that ragged cough with me (the cough that causes people to look at you with a sense concern--for themselves).
When I'm sick, I take things for granted. Things like being able to sleep through the night, being able to breathe with my mouth closed. My appetite. Until yesterday, I didn't have one, so I had to force myself to eat. My diet consisted mostly of water, tea and soup. Last night though, my stomach said NEED MORE so I added ham, biscuits and a root beer float (not together, mind you). And even at that, the tummy still said "NEED MORE".
It was a joy to eat.
I used to hear men and women experience illness differently. I didn't believe this until I married this husband of mine. When I'm sick, I pretty much just want to be left alone. I ride out the storm until I am well again, doing my best to avoid the pharmaceuticals (other than the vap-o-rub). Mr. Nina on the other hand has a little issue with acceptance. He won't admit the virus has won until he's well into the feeling-like-crap stage. Until that time he'll push himself, insist on doing everything himself, butt in when I'm making him something to insist 'he can do it he's not sick'.
And then once the virus has announced "I'm here to stay white man", he goes into the whine mode.
Endless phrases like "honey I don't feeeeeeeeeel well" and "I haaaaaate being sick" are heard. And worse even it is when it is a virus I too have had, for then I am asked endless questions like "honey when you had this did your eyes water" and "honey when you had this did your ears hurt".
On and on and on.
I was tapped out on patience today so I replied to those questions with "I already answered that 50 times yesterday. The same answer applies again today."
I know, takes longer to say such things instead of a simple "yes".
Throughout it all though, there has been one hero in the household, one being who has withstood the coughing and sneezing, the moaning and complaining with a quiet patience not seen in people. This sweet little being has agreed to put aside some of her needs so that the two of us can heal.
That sweet little being, that hero, would be our dog.
Ruuuff.
Quote Of The Century
"The flow of credit is the lifeblood of our economy."
Barrack Obama
2/24/2009
Here we are again, facing a situation similar to that of the Depression and every other controlled economic downturn in history. We have resources not being utilized. We have men and women willing to participate and work. And yet, once again, we have the Bankers holding money and credit and as such, the resources, hostage.
To say credit is the lifeblood of our economy is to say the blood is seriously diseased. Always has been, always will be.
Oh yes, a growing number of people are angry. And yet the anger is blinding them to the above. For instead of pausing to think "hmm, maybe there is another way", they are putting their faith into our new messiah and this massive debt he's just dumped on us and future generations. In short, thinking outside of the box hasn't happened.
Yet.
I mean, come on. Shouldn't WE THE PEOPLE be the lifeblood of the economy? Shouldn't it be WE THE PEOPLE utilizing resources responsibly and thoughtfully that is the lifeblood?
Instead, it's money and credit that is the lifeblood, even though those are merely tools to the real holders of the blood bags: the banks.
I found it humorous that the prez thought he would get away with saying this stimulus package wasn't about the banks when, in reality, it is. For everything that you and I buy or borrow through credit or money ends up going back to the banks in some way. Give Fred a tax break so he can spend more money on food at the local grocery store so the local store owner can put that cash in the bank bag at the end of the day. Give Sally some credit so she can finance that car and pay the bank a shitload of interest. Free up some more of that credit so Jack and Sue can buy that pretty little house in the subarbs and pay rent and ridiculous amounts of interest to the bank for 30 years in hopes that someday before they die, that land and home will be theirs.
Can't you see that in the end, the banks win? They never suffer. No matter what the economic condition is. Oh sure, lots of the banks employees, the "little people" (those who do the real work for the least pay), lose their jobs. But the big wigs, even if their bank gets seized or eaten alive by an even bigger bank, oh see, they always come out on top just fine. No bumps, no bruises.
I'm really reaching for the stars here, but it is my wish that we use this stimulus money to build something new for you and me. That we utilize those brains of ours to devise a plan or plans to create a society where it is YOU AND ME who is the lifeblood, who is at the heart of the economy, the soul of prosperity.
Money and credit, money and credit. Blah blah blah. Been there, done that. Works for the few. Makes life an unnecessary stressful hassle for the rest. Time for something new.
Barrack Obama
2/24/2009
Here we are again, facing a situation similar to that of the Depression and every other controlled economic downturn in history. We have resources not being utilized. We have men and women willing to participate and work. And yet, once again, we have the Bankers holding money and credit and as such, the resources, hostage.
To say credit is the lifeblood of our economy is to say the blood is seriously diseased. Always has been, always will be.
Oh yes, a growing number of people are angry. And yet the anger is blinding them to the above. For instead of pausing to think "hmm, maybe there is another way", they are putting their faith into our new messiah and this massive debt he's just dumped on us and future generations. In short, thinking outside of the box hasn't happened.
Yet.
I mean, come on. Shouldn't WE THE PEOPLE be the lifeblood of the economy? Shouldn't it be WE THE PEOPLE utilizing resources responsibly and thoughtfully that is the lifeblood?
Instead, it's money and credit that is the lifeblood, even though those are merely tools to the real holders of the blood bags: the banks.
I found it humorous that the prez thought he would get away with saying this stimulus package wasn't about the banks when, in reality, it is. For everything that you and I buy or borrow through credit or money ends up going back to the banks in some way. Give Fred a tax break so he can spend more money on food at the local grocery store so the local store owner can put that cash in the bank bag at the end of the day. Give Sally some credit so she can finance that car and pay the bank a shitload of interest. Free up some more of that credit so Jack and Sue can buy that pretty little house in the subarbs and pay rent and ridiculous amounts of interest to the bank for 30 years in hopes that someday before they die, that land and home will be theirs.
Can't you see that in the end, the banks win? They never suffer. No matter what the economic condition is. Oh sure, lots of the banks employees, the "little people" (those who do the real work for the least pay), lose their jobs. But the big wigs, even if their bank gets seized or eaten alive by an even bigger bank, oh see, they always come out on top just fine. No bumps, no bruises.
I'm really reaching for the stars here, but it is my wish that we use this stimulus money to build something new for you and me. That we utilize those brains of ours to devise a plan or plans to create a society where it is YOU AND ME who is the lifeblood, who is at the heart of the economy, the soul of prosperity.
Money and credit, money and credit. Blah blah blah. Been there, done that. Works for the few. Makes life an unnecessary stressful hassle for the rest. Time for something new.
2.20.2009
Hallucinations
I'm currently at battle with some upper resp. virus, this being day number two. I'm trying to drown it out with massive amounts of raw garlic. I don't know yet what is winning: the garlic or the virus. Perhaps they're calling a truce. All I know is the experience is giving me those moments where I find myself staring at nothing in particular, my mind suddenly in a world of its own, lending itself to a hallucination or two. I'd like to share a few of them.
While reading "The Fisher King", I suddenly became one of the Knights of the Round Table, on a quest for the mythical holy grail. I could feel the armor, cold, heavy. It's lonely under all of that metal.
Last night at 2:18 a.m., I woke up suddenly, thinking I heard a noise. For some reason, I thought we had a cat inside the house. I threw back the covers and stumbled out into the living room (to go look for a cat that somehow miraculously broke into the house only disturbing me but not our ever-watchful dog) but was sidetracked by my bladder saying "empty me now" which I did only to finish and wonder "what did I get out of bed for to begin with again??"
It was a wonderfully warm sunny day outside. I sat outside in my black yoga pants, sweatshirt, drinking hot tea, wrapped inside a blanket. I was still cold. (I know that wasn't a hallucination. I'm just trying to garner sympathy.)
A friend came over this evening. We all got into a metaphysical discussion. As I listened to him share his perspective on buddhist thought, my brain suddenly announced "too much information" and my imagination took over whereby I saw myself out in a field of lavendar, dancing under the moon. Seriously.
It took me 35 minutes to write the above. I've had to stop several times to remember my train of thought. Don't ask what I thought during these pauses as I don't remember. As such, I am going to bed now.
While reading "The Fisher King", I suddenly became one of the Knights of the Round Table, on a quest for the mythical holy grail. I could feel the armor, cold, heavy. It's lonely under all of that metal.
Last night at 2:18 a.m., I woke up suddenly, thinking I heard a noise. For some reason, I thought we had a cat inside the house. I threw back the covers and stumbled out into the living room (to go look for a cat that somehow miraculously broke into the house only disturbing me but not our ever-watchful dog) but was sidetracked by my bladder saying "empty me now" which I did only to finish and wonder "what did I get out of bed for to begin with again??"
It was a wonderfully warm sunny day outside. I sat outside in my black yoga pants, sweatshirt, drinking hot tea, wrapped inside a blanket. I was still cold. (I know that wasn't a hallucination. I'm just trying to garner sympathy.)
A friend came over this evening. We all got into a metaphysical discussion. As I listened to him share his perspective on buddhist thought, my brain suddenly announced "too much information" and my imagination took over whereby I saw myself out in a field of lavendar, dancing under the moon. Seriously.
It took me 35 minutes to write the above. I've had to stop several times to remember my train of thought. Don't ask what I thought during these pauses as I don't remember. As such, I am going to bed now.
2.19.2009
Quote Of The Day
"America was built on the backs of people like you."
Michelle Obama
This wasn't just a metaphoric statement. It was also a literal statement. It serves only to continue our mindset that we must work hard and be enslaved so that others may succeed into wealth while we, the "people like you" are given enough to survive on with no promises that this won't be taken away from you by some banker or employer.
Michelle Obama
This wasn't just a metaphoric statement. It was also a literal statement. It serves only to continue our mindset that we must work hard and be enslaved so that others may succeed into wealth while we, the "people like you" are given enough to survive on with no promises that this won't be taken away from you by some banker or employer.
2.18.2009
A World Without Money. Can You Imagine?
For well over a decade, I've had these visions of a society where everybody has their basic needs met and provided for: food, shelter, clothing, education, health care, water. Such needs being provided for while income/money not being a factor. I've seen homes built into the hills and mountains. Homes that are in symbiosis with nature.
Lately, I've been thinking about the possibility of such a society without the need for money or credit. That's right. No banks. No wall street. Imagine that? Refreshing. But likely causing you to pause. Possibly even cringing or dismissing the idea as nonsense, even foolish. Perhaps even unamerican. That's understandable. We've all been conditioned to believe we NEED money. We NEED the banks. Competition is good. People have to PROVE their worth. Gotta EARN our keep. Survival of the fittest.
As we look around our society, what's causing this crisis?
Money. Credit. And the lack of it being distributed.
We still have the means to produce the goods and services, and yet jobs are still disappearing.
People are losing their homes to banks, but the homes are still there, waiting for someone to occupy them all the while homelessness increases.
And yet, it is those controlling the money and the credit that is STOPPING the job creation, the production of goods and services and the homes from being foreclosed upon.
In short, the resources are there. The will is there. The man/woman power is there.
It's the money and credit distribution that's, er, being sequestered, if you will.
There is a movement afoot that I stumbled upon. The Venus Project. A movement that looks to create a resource-based society instead of a monetary-based society. I cannot possibly begin to cover it all in this one post. I still have questions of my own. But I do know this: The monetary system creates lack and scarcity. It creates an ongoing fear that resides within us all. On a planet that has the means to provide us with unlimited resources if we choose to utilize them responsibly, there is NO REASON why we must continue on with this old archaic means of living.
No reason.
Of course, as mentioned previously, all of this is threatening to the current system supporters and creators. It's threatening to those who have benefited by the system, either through honest or dishonest means. It's threatening to every person who places a higher value on money than on people. And it is indeed time for us to wake up to this, for we have all supported this system in one way or another. We have all, knowingly or unknowingly, continued to place more importance and value on money than we have on basic human worth and value.
Hopefully when we become fully aware of this, we can begin to be open to the idea of something new.
This idea isn't perfect. Those behind it attest to that. But, as I heard the founder of the Venus Project say, "we have to start somewhere".
Indeed, we do.
We have to ask the tough question.
What's most important? Truly important in our hearts.
The well-being of people or money. ?
For we simply cannot have a money-based system AND put the importance of human value as number one. We can't. Sooner or later, money interferes and begins to take precedence. I've seen it in my own life. Certainly I see it every time I turn on the television and am in direct contact with the outside world.
A money-based society, as I said, creates lack and scarcity. It says there's only so much to go around. It says you are worth this and I am worth that. And tragically, this has created a system where we are always focused more on how to make money, will it be enough, how will I pay my bills, will I lose my job, what if I lose my job, do I have enough this week to provide for my family. Even for those who are ultra wealthy, they're still focused on their money. Is it working for them. What if they lose it. Is it in a safe place. Is it invested wisely.
Money is the center of our universe, people. And it doesn't have to be that way. There is always room for something new. Imagine working less. Imagine having more time to do the things you truly WANT to do. Imagine more time with those you love. Imagine not ever once again having to worry about money. Can you do that? I'd say there's likely a "yes" somewhere within you.
I invite you to contemplate what I have written and check out a couple of websites. The Zeitgeist Movement. The Venus Project. Give them a visit. Take your time as your read through the material. While I am not saying to run out and join these folks, it is certainly worth your time to talk about with these concepts with others. Start your own world. Create your own reality, your own system, with other like-minded folks.
As open as I am to such a new way of living, the information I read challenged some of my own beliefs. But it did something else as well. It gave me reason to embrace the notion of something new.
And clearly what we have created and been supporting is certainly not working.
I am so so so ready for something new. Are you? If so, let's begin talking! I believe, to the depths of who I am, that there is no greater, no more important topic for us to be talking about.
Lately, I've been thinking about the possibility of such a society without the need for money or credit. That's right. No banks. No wall street. Imagine that? Refreshing. But likely causing you to pause. Possibly even cringing or dismissing the idea as nonsense, even foolish. Perhaps even unamerican. That's understandable. We've all been conditioned to believe we NEED money. We NEED the banks. Competition is good. People have to PROVE their worth. Gotta EARN our keep. Survival of the fittest.
As we look around our society, what's causing this crisis?
Money. Credit. And the lack of it being distributed.
We still have the means to produce the goods and services, and yet jobs are still disappearing.
People are losing their homes to banks, but the homes are still there, waiting for someone to occupy them all the while homelessness increases.
And yet, it is those controlling the money and the credit that is STOPPING the job creation, the production of goods and services and the homes from being foreclosed upon.
In short, the resources are there. The will is there. The man/woman power is there.
It's the money and credit distribution that's, er, being sequestered, if you will.
There is a movement afoot that I stumbled upon. The Venus Project. A movement that looks to create a resource-based society instead of a monetary-based society. I cannot possibly begin to cover it all in this one post. I still have questions of my own. But I do know this: The monetary system creates lack and scarcity. It creates an ongoing fear that resides within us all. On a planet that has the means to provide us with unlimited resources if we choose to utilize them responsibly, there is NO REASON why we must continue on with this old archaic means of living.
No reason.
Of course, as mentioned previously, all of this is threatening to the current system supporters and creators. It's threatening to those who have benefited by the system, either through honest or dishonest means. It's threatening to every person who places a higher value on money than on people. And it is indeed time for us to wake up to this, for we have all supported this system in one way or another. We have all, knowingly or unknowingly, continued to place more importance and value on money than we have on basic human worth and value.
Hopefully when we become fully aware of this, we can begin to be open to the idea of something new.
This idea isn't perfect. Those behind it attest to that. But, as I heard the founder of the Venus Project say, "we have to start somewhere".
Indeed, we do.
We have to ask the tough question.
What's most important? Truly important in our hearts.
The well-being of people or money. ?
For we simply cannot have a money-based system AND put the importance of human value as number one. We can't. Sooner or later, money interferes and begins to take precedence. I've seen it in my own life. Certainly I see it every time I turn on the television and am in direct contact with the outside world.
A money-based society, as I said, creates lack and scarcity. It says there's only so much to go around. It says you are worth this and I am worth that. And tragically, this has created a system where we are always focused more on how to make money, will it be enough, how will I pay my bills, will I lose my job, what if I lose my job, do I have enough this week to provide for my family. Even for those who are ultra wealthy, they're still focused on their money. Is it working for them. What if they lose it. Is it in a safe place. Is it invested wisely.
Money is the center of our universe, people. And it doesn't have to be that way. There is always room for something new. Imagine working less. Imagine having more time to do the things you truly WANT to do. Imagine more time with those you love. Imagine not ever once again having to worry about money. Can you do that? I'd say there's likely a "yes" somewhere within you.
I invite you to contemplate what I have written and check out a couple of websites. The Zeitgeist Movement. The Venus Project. Give them a visit. Take your time as your read through the material. While I am not saying to run out and join these folks, it is certainly worth your time to talk about with these concepts with others. Start your own world. Create your own reality, your own system, with other like-minded folks.
As open as I am to such a new way of living, the information I read challenged some of my own beliefs. But it did something else as well. It gave me reason to embrace the notion of something new.
And clearly what we have created and been supporting is certainly not working.
I am so so so ready for something new. Are you? If so, let's begin talking! I believe, to the depths of who I am, that there is no greater, no more important topic for us to be talking about.
2.17.2009
Conversations
Some recent conversations I've either been engaged in or overheard.
*Three children talking about what they want to be when they "grow up". One said he wanted to be a firefighter. Another, a mommy. The last one, a painter. I commented those were great choices. The painter-to-be looked at me, then asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. I laughed and said I was still waiting for that moment to happen. They didn't get it. I figure someday, they will.
*While at the store, two clerks were discussing hookah's. One had one, the other did not. The one who did not was talking about using the apple-flavor tobacco they have. The other talked about the health issue of tobacco. I spoke up and said, "you could bypass that by smoking the whacky tobaccy". The one who had the hookah spurted out a laugh. The one who did not gave me an odd look. I looked down and mumbled "it was a joke."
*Overheard in line at another store, this one with those crazy tabloid papers, were two elderly women talking about jesus christ and the demise of our culture while they read said tabloid trash. It was one of those moments where you think "ok where's the camera?"
*This wasn't a human conversation, but I did see two dogs facing each other, their tails wagging wildly. I can only think it was love at first sight.
*Aunt to niece. "I said no!" Niece replies "But i WAAAAAAAAAAANT it!" Aunt says "I said no!" Niece continues her case "But I reallllllllllllly have to have it!" "No!" "Yes!" "No!" "Yes!" Silence followed by the sound of a door slamming and something along the lines of "blah blah blah not fair!". I don't think the niece won her case.
*"Everyone I know is either out of work or looking for a job." Said last week by a visiting girlfriend.
*We will be ok. Together. Says the voice in my heart.
*Three children talking about what they want to be when they "grow up". One said he wanted to be a firefighter. Another, a mommy. The last one, a painter. I commented those were great choices. The painter-to-be looked at me, then asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. I laughed and said I was still waiting for that moment to happen. They didn't get it. I figure someday, they will.
*While at the store, two clerks were discussing hookah's. One had one, the other did not. The one who did not was talking about using the apple-flavor tobacco they have. The other talked about the health issue of tobacco. I spoke up and said, "you could bypass that by smoking the whacky tobaccy". The one who had the hookah spurted out a laugh. The one who did not gave me an odd look. I looked down and mumbled "it was a joke."
*Overheard in line at another store, this one with those crazy tabloid papers, were two elderly women talking about jesus christ and the demise of our culture while they read said tabloid trash. It was one of those moments where you think "ok where's the camera?"
*This wasn't a human conversation, but I did see two dogs facing each other, their tails wagging wildly. I can only think it was love at first sight.
*Aunt to niece. "I said no!" Niece replies "But i WAAAAAAAAAAANT it!" Aunt says "I said no!" Niece continues her case "But I reallllllllllllly have to have it!" "No!" "Yes!" "No!" "Yes!" Silence followed by the sound of a door slamming and something along the lines of "blah blah blah not fair!". I don't think the niece won her case.
*"Everyone I know is either out of work or looking for a job." Said last week by a visiting girlfriend.
*We will be ok. Together. Says the voice in my heart.
2.15.2009
NAIS: Big Brother Comin' To Your Home And Dinnertable
Heard of this little Orwellian agenda? I hadn't until tonight. The NAIS, or National Animal Identification System, is a movement being proposed by the Feds that would require every citizen, whether you own a factory farm, small family farm OR have a simple chicken on your property or any other livestock, to tag every single animal and send the information to the Gov't, which would put the animal in a national database. Oh yeah, and you get to pay for it.
Being sold to the public as a means of safety and protection from disease for the consumer, it's just another step towards a world whereby all that we do, including owning a horse or llama to what animals we choose to have on our land to feed ourselves, is monitored. Here's what the USDA website has to say: To protect the health of U.S. livestock and poultry and the economic well-being of those industries, we must be able to quickly and effectively trace an animal disease to its source.
This would affect every one of us. Here's what this System would lead to: (taken from NoNais.Org):
Consumers will face higher meat prices under NAIS because the cost of producing meat will go up with the addition of fees to the government to support the NAIS program. The cost of other foods, like vegetables, will likely also go up as well since the manure from meat animals is used to fertilize the soil to grow better crops. Most importantly, NAIS will result in many small farms going out of business. The consolidation of the meat industry into fewer, big, agri-biz producers means they will have more control of the market and be able to charge higher prices for the same product.
Pet owners will be forced to register their family horse, pet sheep, llamas and other ‘livestock’ that aren’t part of the food chain. This will cost them money and be a hassle with paperwork and premise ID fees each year. Furthermore, every time you want to take your pet to the vet, on a trail ride or even just cross the road you’ll have to submit paperwork with the government and probably pay a fee. Every time. In time, they plan to do the same for pet dogs and cats. See PAWS legislation and the Vermont Pet Merchant bill that requires you to register as a pet dealer if you cat has kittens or your dog has puppies.
Children who are in 4-H or Future Farmers of America will have to register their parents house as a farm and get a Premise ID as well as paying the annual fees and doing paper work every time an animal is bought, sold, shown or moved. This will also stifle county fairs which are already on fragile footing. Figure you’ll not be seeing livestock at fairs of the future - there will just be the midway and amusement rides that are poorly inspected, but no animals.
Homesteaders, people who grow some of their own food, will have to register with the government as a farm and obtain a Premise ID. They’ll also have to pay the annual fees associated with that and fill out the paperwork on all of their livestock. Every time you have chicks, goats, piglets or other animals born you’ll need to register it with the government. Every time an animal dies you’ll have to register it with the government. Got a predator problem? Expect to fill out a lot of paperwork. Have an animal escape the fence and cross the road or go onto a neighbor’s property? Fill out more forms and the neighbor may have to fill out forms, too. Animals come on to your property uninvited? More forms. And no, there are no exceptions. Every livestock animal must be registered, tagged and tracked from birth to death.
Small Farmers who sell direct to their customers will be devastated. Small farmers already work at higher costs than the big factory farms. Under NAIS they’ll have to identify each and every animal at a high cost because they can’t use the group identification techniques of the big Agri-Biz corporations. The big guys do all-in/all-out animal management. Each mass group of animals are of one gene stock and the same age. The factory farms need only apply for one ID to cover the entire group of thousands of animals. Small, traditional-style farmers have many, genetically diverse animals of different ages on their farms. Each individual animal will be required to have an ID. The result is that the cost of farming will go up greatly for small farmers. This is likely to be the final nail in the coffin of small farming.
FMI, including how to get involved to stop this from becoming a reality, check out the NoNais website.
So far, this movement is voluntary, although given a report I heard tonight on the Matrix News Network by Judith McGreary, attorney and member of the Farm and Ranch Freedom Alliance, the USDA has been putting pressure on folks at the state level to begin compliance with the system. For example, farmers who have been affected by drought have been told they must comply with the tagging system if they wish to receive federal funds.
Update: As a commenter pointed out, this is not a movement. It is a mandate. Check out her comment--she also has a book out on the market about this topic. I also wanted to post another website dedicate to stopping it. I reference it above, but failed to provide the link to the website. Freedom Farm Alliance. On the site, they have a pdf file that includes a link to sending your message or your story (if you own livestock) to the USDA. You have until MARCH 16th, 2009 to do this. There's also a link to contact your state rep. to share your concerns.
Being sold to the public as a means of safety and protection from disease for the consumer, it's just another step towards a world whereby all that we do, including owning a horse or llama to what animals we choose to have on our land to feed ourselves, is monitored. Here's what the USDA website has to say: To protect the health of U.S. livestock and poultry and the economic well-being of those industries, we must be able to quickly and effectively trace an animal disease to its source.
Talk about propaganda and public pandering. These are the same people who have refused to allow testing of cows for mad cow disease. These are the same people who have allowed the use of hormones and antibiotics in our meat and dairy supply. These are the same people who have allowed cows to eat cows. They want to protect you and me? Please. Tell us another line of shit. Make it more colorful so as not to blind us all.
If this plan isn't ridiculous (not to mention invasive) enough, whenever the animal is moved away from the home property, say to travel to a fair or take a simple trip to the vet, that movement must be documented and reported.This would affect every one of us. Here's what this System would lead to: (taken from NoNais.Org):
Consumers will face higher meat prices under NAIS because the cost of producing meat will go up with the addition of fees to the government to support the NAIS program. The cost of other foods, like vegetables, will likely also go up as well since the manure from meat animals is used to fertilize the soil to grow better crops. Most importantly, NAIS will result in many small farms going out of business. The consolidation of the meat industry into fewer, big, agri-biz producers means they will have more control of the market and be able to charge higher prices for the same product.
Pet owners will be forced to register their family horse, pet sheep, llamas and other ‘livestock’ that aren’t part of the food chain. This will cost them money and be a hassle with paperwork and premise ID fees each year. Furthermore, every time you want to take your pet to the vet, on a trail ride or even just cross the road you’ll have to submit paperwork with the government and probably pay a fee. Every time. In time, they plan to do the same for pet dogs and cats. See PAWS legislation and the Vermont Pet Merchant bill that requires you to register as a pet dealer if you cat has kittens or your dog has puppies.
Children who are in 4-H or Future Farmers of America will have to register their parents house as a farm and get a Premise ID as well as paying the annual fees and doing paper work every time an animal is bought, sold, shown or moved. This will also stifle county fairs which are already on fragile footing. Figure you’ll not be seeing livestock at fairs of the future - there will just be the midway and amusement rides that are poorly inspected, but no animals.
Homesteaders, people who grow some of their own food, will have to register with the government as a farm and obtain a Premise ID. They’ll also have to pay the annual fees associated with that and fill out the paperwork on all of their livestock. Every time you have chicks, goats, piglets or other animals born you’ll need to register it with the government. Every time an animal dies you’ll have to register it with the government. Got a predator problem? Expect to fill out a lot of paperwork. Have an animal escape the fence and cross the road or go onto a neighbor’s property? Fill out more forms and the neighbor may have to fill out forms, too. Animals come on to your property uninvited? More forms. And no, there are no exceptions. Every livestock animal must be registered, tagged and tracked from birth to death.
Small Farmers who sell direct to their customers will be devastated. Small farmers already work at higher costs than the big factory farms. Under NAIS they’ll have to identify each and every animal at a high cost because they can’t use the group identification techniques of the big Agri-Biz corporations. The big guys do all-in/all-out animal management. Each mass group of animals are of one gene stock and the same age. The factory farms need only apply for one ID to cover the entire group of thousands of animals. Small, traditional-style farmers have many, genetically diverse animals of different ages on their farms. Each individual animal will be required to have an ID. The result is that the cost of farming will go up greatly for small farmers. This is likely to be the final nail in the coffin of small farming.
FMI, including how to get involved to stop this from becoming a reality, check out the NoNais website.
So far, this movement is voluntary, although given a report I heard tonight on the Matrix News Network by Judith McGreary, attorney and member of the Farm and Ranch Freedom Alliance, the USDA has been putting pressure on folks at the state level to begin compliance with the system. For example, farmers who have been affected by drought have been told they must comply with the tagging system if they wish to receive federal funds.
Update: As a commenter pointed out, this is not a movement. It is a mandate. Check out her comment--she also has a book out on the market about this topic. I also wanted to post another website dedicate to stopping it. I reference it above, but failed to provide the link to the website. Freedom Farm Alliance. On the site, they have a pdf file that includes a link to sending your message or your story (if you own livestock) to the USDA. You have until MARCH 16th, 2009 to do this. There's also a link to contact your state rep. to share your concerns.
2.12.2009
Paranormal Experiences
After following tales of the paranormal on My Favorite Monster's and today, linking to Above The Norm, I've decided to write in more detail about what I've experienced over the years. I don't know why I don't focus on this topic in more detail on this blog given I'm a HUGE paranormal/metaphysic buff. I watch a variety of paranormal programs on cable TV. I love sharing stories with friends about moments of synchronicity and intuitive impressions and knowings. Plus, as some of my readers know, Mr. Nina and I have seen numerous UFO's in the skies since we hooked up over 10 years ago.
My first paranormal encounter happened when I was around 9 or 10. I was in the 4th grade and having a challenging time in school (a not-so-unusual experience for me). Without going into detail, my teacher frightened me. He was impatient and had a propensity to yell loudly, which perhaps some children could benefit from, but not yours truly. I was the type where all I needed was a raised eyebrow and I got back in line. Anyway as a result I was having a lot of anxiety and tummy aches. One night, sometime in the middle of the night, I awoke to find what looked to be my mom standing at the end of my bed, only it wasn't my mom. This woman floated and had a glow all around her. I remember she looked at me with so much love. Everything about her was alive and lit up with an energy I had never seen in any human. I sat up in bed, fascinated and silenced (silence being an unusual thing for me, certainly when I was in awe). I remember pinching myself to make sure I was awake.
Ouch! I was!
I watched this beautiful being as she moved to the side of my bed where she looked down at me and smiled with a love I had never seen. I smiled back. I felt so warm and loved, safe and so protected.
She then looked out the window, putting her hand on the curtain as if to pull them back in order to check outside, only her hand went through the curtain.
I remember thinking that was SO cool.
She looked down at me one last time, then walked away towards the end of my bed and disappeared.
The moment was gone and I was back in reality. Looking back, it seems as though I was in some sort of a trance, for once I was back in reality I called to my mom. She responded back and I asked why she had been in my room. She said she hadn't been in there, so I told her what happened (her room was next to mine so this conversation took place w/both of us in our own beds). She said it was a dream. I was adamant that it wasn't.
I was silenced. Another not-so-unusual event of my childhood.
To this day, thinking about this brings tears to my eyes. Some days I call out for this being. I haven't seen her again. I sure wish she would pay me a visit if she's still around me. Life can feel very lonely for me at times.
Actually, as my mind is working on this topic, I remember this wasn't my first experience with the paranormal. When I was 5 or 6, I was lying in bed. It was a summer evening, so it was still light out. I was fully of envy for the older children who got to stay up later and as such, were outside playing. I looked up at my window and saw a man appear with a hat and trench coat. He smiled at me and winked. Instead of feeling comforted, I was terrified, so I screamed at the top of my lungs. Well, that brought my parents into my room in a flash, looking terrified.
"There was a man looking in my window!" I screamed.
My dad immediately ran outside where he looked all around. He came back inside and insisted all he saw were children. He even asked the kids and no one had seen any strange man in our front yard. I insisted what I saw was real. Like a lot of children's "tales", it was dismissed as an active imagination.
I don't know who that man was, but he certainly did creep me out. My grandpa died when I was around this age and he used to wear a hat and long coats over his jacket. I don't know if this event happened before or after he died though. If it happened after-the-fact, it may have been him, for he also used to wink at me.
Whatever it was, it still makes me feel a bit uncomfortable to this day, likely due to the childhood story of the boogey man.
One last one then I'll close up for now. My next encounter with the other world came many years later. Well, an encounter with someone I knew in this life that is. I was living in another part of the country, married and miserable. Terribly homesick as well. I had been contemplating suicide, although I never would have gone through with it. In short, I was just having a hard time finding anything worth living for.
So one afternoon, I was walking my dog I had at the time. Something told me to look down and there was a penny. "Pick up the penny," I heard a voice say in my mind, rather adamantly.
I shrugged it off. Pick up a penny. Whatever.
The next day, again on a walk, I was once again guided to look down. There was another penny. And again, the same voice.
Hmm, I thought. This time I picked up the penny.
For the next week or so, I started seeing pennies all over the grounds of my apartment complex. I'd feel the urge to look down and sure enough, there would be a penny, with that voice saying "pick up the penny!"
As I sat thinking about this strange experience one day, I recalled a memory I had of my grandpa (not the one I refer to earlier). He had died when I was 17. I was pretty close to him and his death had been really painful for me, despite it taking almost 7 years for me to actually grieve his death. I was experiencing emotional deadness at the time of his death, you could say.
Anyway, the memory was of grampy and I walking to the store to get candy. Suddenly he stopped and said "a penny!" I looked down and said something like "uh huh". Grampy wouldn't go anywhere. "Pick up that penny!" he insisted, an excited grin on his face. So I picked it up.
Within days of this memory I just happened to be watching a tv show that had on two psychics who were also mediums. One of them was talking about how our loved ones, after they have crossed over, will often visit us. Sometimes they come in dreams. Sometimes they'll leave things lying around, guiding us to look at it or pick up an object. When asked for an example, one woman said "quite often they will use pennies."
Well! I was floored upon hearing that statement. That confirmed it for me. Grampy had returned. He had seen how discouraged I had been and was trying to let me know I was not alone.
I don't know how long I cried, but cry I did for some time.
Shortly after I met Mr. Nina, he began to see pennies as well. And if that isn't cool in and of itself, when he proposed to me, we found a pile of pennies in the parking lot of the mountaintop park in which he proposed.
To this day, I still find pennies, only now it's evolved into me often knowing ahead of time when I will see one.
And I still say "thank you grampy".
My first paranormal encounter happened when I was around 9 or 10. I was in the 4th grade and having a challenging time in school (a not-so-unusual experience for me). Without going into detail, my teacher frightened me. He was impatient and had a propensity to yell loudly, which perhaps some children could benefit from, but not yours truly. I was the type where all I needed was a raised eyebrow and I got back in line. Anyway as a result I was having a lot of anxiety and tummy aches. One night, sometime in the middle of the night, I awoke to find what looked to be my mom standing at the end of my bed, only it wasn't my mom. This woman floated and had a glow all around her. I remember she looked at me with so much love. Everything about her was alive and lit up with an energy I had never seen in any human. I sat up in bed, fascinated and silenced (silence being an unusual thing for me, certainly when I was in awe). I remember pinching myself to make sure I was awake.
Ouch! I was!
I watched this beautiful being as she moved to the side of my bed where she looked down at me and smiled with a love I had never seen. I smiled back. I felt so warm and loved, safe and so protected.
She then looked out the window, putting her hand on the curtain as if to pull them back in order to check outside, only her hand went through the curtain.
I remember thinking that was SO cool.
She looked down at me one last time, then walked away towards the end of my bed and disappeared.
The moment was gone and I was back in reality. Looking back, it seems as though I was in some sort of a trance, for once I was back in reality I called to my mom. She responded back and I asked why she had been in my room. She said she hadn't been in there, so I told her what happened (her room was next to mine so this conversation took place w/both of us in our own beds). She said it was a dream. I was adamant that it wasn't.
I was silenced. Another not-so-unusual event of my childhood.
To this day, thinking about this brings tears to my eyes. Some days I call out for this being. I haven't seen her again. I sure wish she would pay me a visit if she's still around me. Life can feel very lonely for me at times.
Actually, as my mind is working on this topic, I remember this wasn't my first experience with the paranormal. When I was 5 or 6, I was lying in bed. It was a summer evening, so it was still light out. I was fully of envy for the older children who got to stay up later and as such, were outside playing. I looked up at my window and saw a man appear with a hat and trench coat. He smiled at me and winked. Instead of feeling comforted, I was terrified, so I screamed at the top of my lungs. Well, that brought my parents into my room in a flash, looking terrified.
"There was a man looking in my window!" I screamed.
My dad immediately ran outside where he looked all around. He came back inside and insisted all he saw were children. He even asked the kids and no one had seen any strange man in our front yard. I insisted what I saw was real. Like a lot of children's "tales", it was dismissed as an active imagination.
I don't know who that man was, but he certainly did creep me out. My grandpa died when I was around this age and he used to wear a hat and long coats over his jacket. I don't know if this event happened before or after he died though. If it happened after-the-fact, it may have been him, for he also used to wink at me.
Whatever it was, it still makes me feel a bit uncomfortable to this day, likely due to the childhood story of the boogey man.
One last one then I'll close up for now. My next encounter with the other world came many years later. Well, an encounter with someone I knew in this life that is. I was living in another part of the country, married and miserable. Terribly homesick as well. I had been contemplating suicide, although I never would have gone through with it. In short, I was just having a hard time finding anything worth living for.
So one afternoon, I was walking my dog I had at the time. Something told me to look down and there was a penny. "Pick up the penny," I heard a voice say in my mind, rather adamantly.
I shrugged it off. Pick up a penny. Whatever.
The next day, again on a walk, I was once again guided to look down. There was another penny. And again, the same voice.
Hmm, I thought. This time I picked up the penny.
For the next week or so, I started seeing pennies all over the grounds of my apartment complex. I'd feel the urge to look down and sure enough, there would be a penny, with that voice saying "pick up the penny!"
As I sat thinking about this strange experience one day, I recalled a memory I had of my grandpa (not the one I refer to earlier). He had died when I was 17. I was pretty close to him and his death had been really painful for me, despite it taking almost 7 years for me to actually grieve his death. I was experiencing emotional deadness at the time of his death, you could say.
Anyway, the memory was of grampy and I walking to the store to get candy. Suddenly he stopped and said "a penny!" I looked down and said something like "uh huh". Grampy wouldn't go anywhere. "Pick up that penny!" he insisted, an excited grin on his face. So I picked it up.
Within days of this memory I just happened to be watching a tv show that had on two psychics who were also mediums. One of them was talking about how our loved ones, after they have crossed over, will often visit us. Sometimes they come in dreams. Sometimes they'll leave things lying around, guiding us to look at it or pick up an object. When asked for an example, one woman said "quite often they will use pennies."
Well! I was floored upon hearing that statement. That confirmed it for me. Grampy had returned. He had seen how discouraged I had been and was trying to let me know I was not alone.
I don't know how long I cried, but cry I did for some time.
Shortly after I met Mr. Nina, he began to see pennies as well. And if that isn't cool in and of itself, when he proposed to me, we found a pile of pennies in the parking lot of the mountaintop park in which he proposed.
To this day, I still find pennies, only now it's evolved into me often knowing ahead of time when I will see one.
And I still say "thank you grampy".
Randomness
Another soc (stream of consciousness) piece.......
folks who refer to god as the father. who wants a parent-child relationship with the creator? don't we spend the first 20 years of our life striving to pull away from the child role?
along those lines, folks who look to the bible as some divinely inspired piece of literature. who is to say it is no more inspired than any other book?
religions sucks. church is boring and is nothing more than a control mechanism. love, however, is cool.
conspiracy theorist debunkers who claim all crop circles have been "proven" to be done by humans using rope and wooden planks. i debunk THAT theory by saying i have read and seen plenty of studies that show many of these crops cannot be done by rope and wood. period.
along those lines, most conspiracy theorist debunkers have an agenda: to debunk anything they find to be out of their limited vision of reality, which means relying on biased studies and junk science.
along those lines one more time, we know very little about how our world, let alone our universe, operates. science is little more than theoretical speculation, meaning there's always room to expand upon original findings.
i have granted myself an honorary phd degree in human behavior.
despite the growing trend of states to declare sovereignty, none have yet actually passed the legislation. oklahoma's quite close, having (overwhelmingly) passed the house last year only to stall in the senate. it is to be reintroduced this year. success will take the will of the people pushing their state officials.
is there a god? no proof of that. i tend to think one of two things: 1) some other species created us in a lab, implanting into our minds thoughts that make us think there's a god in the skies. for those who believe in reincarnation, thoughts implanted into our minds of other memories that we think are ours. 2) we've always been and the concept of "god" is nothing more than the sum of all of our energies. personally, i lean towards #2, although i do believe we should not dismiss the idea of #1.
folks who refer to god as the father. who wants a parent-child relationship with the creator? don't we spend the first 20 years of our life striving to pull away from the child role?
along those lines, folks who look to the bible as some divinely inspired piece of literature. who is to say it is no more inspired than any other book?
religions sucks. church is boring and is nothing more than a control mechanism. love, however, is cool.
conspiracy theorist debunkers who claim all crop circles have been "proven" to be done by humans using rope and wooden planks. i debunk THAT theory by saying i have read and seen plenty of studies that show many of these crops cannot be done by rope and wood. period.
along those lines, most conspiracy theorist debunkers have an agenda: to debunk anything they find to be out of their limited vision of reality, which means relying on biased studies and junk science.
along those lines one more time, we know very little about how our world, let alone our universe, operates. science is little more than theoretical speculation, meaning there's always room to expand upon original findings.
i have granted myself an honorary phd degree in human behavior.
despite the growing trend of states to declare sovereignty, none have yet actually passed the legislation. oklahoma's quite close, having (overwhelmingly) passed the house last year only to stall in the senate. it is to be reintroduced this year. success will take the will of the people pushing their state officials.
is there a god? no proof of that. i tend to think one of two things: 1) some other species created us in a lab, implanting into our minds thoughts that make us think there's a god in the skies. for those who believe in reincarnation, thoughts implanted into our minds of other memories that we think are ours. 2) we've always been and the concept of "god" is nothing more than the sum of all of our energies. personally, i lean towards #2, although i do believe we should not dismiss the idea of #1.
2.11.2009
Undeclared War and the Destruction of the Constitution
This just isn't about Bush. It's about Clinton, Reagan, Kennedy, Johnson. Oooh, these folks have been very very bad for a very very long time.
"Unless the country is being invaded, if the congress does not declare war against another country, the president is constitutionally barred from waging it, no matter how much he desires to do so."
So says that pesky little document called the Constitution.
"Unless the country is being invaded, if the congress does not declare war against another country, the president is constitutionally barred from waging it, no matter how much he desires to do so."
So says that pesky little document called the Constitution.
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