I have moments when I wonder why bother to share what I know with the world. What's the point? People aren't waking up. Or when they do, they typically walk around like a deer caught in the headlights, only to return to the forest.
After 9/11, when I mentioned the idea of controlled demolition, I was met with a lot of hostility.
When I suggested that perhaps we take some deep breaths and THINK before acting. That perhaps the Government was not being truthful with us, that it seemed rather odd that within HOURS of the Twin Towers collapsing, Bin Laden's name was connected to it. That perhaps heading off to Afghanistan to blow up a bunch of shit in search of ONE PERSON was not a rational thing to do. Perhaps, I said, he wasn't behind it. Saying such things I was attacked yet again, this time from family and strangers alike.
When I said, 4 years ago, that the dollar would continue to decline and gold would reach upwards of $1,000 an ounce, I got criticized for thinking such thoughts, criticized even more when I suggested I was thinking of investing in some gold.
When I suggested a year ago that Hewlett Packard was gearing up to leave Corvallis, I got accused of spreading lies by some HP Employees on an online venue. I was threatened to keep my mouth shut lest I be accused of slander.
When I have spoken about the Health Care System, about Corporate Greed, the Corruption of our Two Party System, about NAFTA, The New World Order, Globalization, about living wage jobs, even about the idea that certain things need be RIGHTS instead of Privileges (such as home ownership, education, food, clothing, water and health care), meaning NOT BASED ON INCOME, it's a rare day I find support. The majority of the time I'm attacked.
I wonder what would happen if I were to stand on a podium and start sharing such thoughts. I wonder what would happen if I were to write this in a book and sell it. Begin speaking publically throughout the country on such issues. Would those verbal attacks turn in to the physical kind?
I keep having this need to SPEAK UP and WARN and UNITE and yet, now and then I stop and think what's the point? How can one person undertake such a task? I may look like an adult, but inside I often feel like I'm 5. People like John Lennon and Martin Luther King JR. had great support around them, people who believed in them. All the true leaders do. And yet, I have my spouse and a dog. It's a start, but it isn't enough. I need more. Real support, authentic support. Not the "I'll cheer you from the sidelines" rah rah type.
Oh well, until such time, I guess I'll just continue to type out my thoughts, trying to convince myself that when that miraculous moment occurs, when someone actually says "thank you for speaking for those of us who can't or don't", that this will continue to give me the spark, energy and motivation I need to carry on.