8.22.2008

Feds Solve Reason Behind Building 7 "Mystery" Collapse

Try and read this one with a straight face.

Open up and say "ah", America. The Government's shoveling more bullshit propaganda down our throats.

"GAITHERSBURG, Md. (Aug. 21) - Federal investigators said Thursday they have solved a mystery of the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks: the collapse of World Trade Center building 7, a source of long-running conspiracy theories.

The 47-story trapezoid-shaped building sat north of the World Trade Center towers, across Vesey Street in lower Manhattan. On Sept. 11, it was set on fire by falling debris from the burning towers, but skeptics have long argued that fire and debris alone should not have brought down such a big steel-and-concrete structure.

Scientists with the National Institute of Standards and Technology say their three-year investigation of the collapse determined the demise of WTC 7 was actually the first time in the world a fire caused the total failure of a skyscraper."

Other "first time in the world" news:

Woman Pulls Golden Pig Out Of Her Ass.

World Leaders Destroy Military Weapons. Declare World Peace.

Walmart Now Paying Associates $35/Hour.

Bill O'Reilly Leaves Fox. Starts "O'Reilly And Friends: Liberal Central" Chat and Love Hour on PBS.

Ralph Nader Elected President.

4 comments:

Pugs in Space said...

Yeah it was just some popcorn that someone burned in the break room microwave. Turned the steel into liquid in seconds. ;)

nolocontendere said...

No no Pugs!
It was a glitch in the matrix that day and the laws of physics were suspended!

crallspace said...

I was gonna say, this is America. If we want to violate the laws of physics and reason for a few minutes, we can! And no liberal activist judge can do anything about it.

crallspace said...

In other words, "We won't be solving the crime of the century - we will give you a conclusion that even a 5 year old could laugh at, now please go shopping!"