Tidbits of (Obvious) Absurd Bullshit

There's so much absurd bullshit these days, it's difficult to decide which tidbits to toss out there at ya'all....

Well, it seems that since GM owns half of GMAC Financial Services (who just happen to give out loans to buyers seeking GM autos), they (GM) are not only asking for money for themselves, but they want to see the Federal Reserve classify GMAC as a bank holding company so that GMAC can also dip into some of that bank money bailout. I heard the term "double dipping" being used. Anyone else have a Seinfeld moment with that one?

Britney Spears was the most searched name on Google for 2008. Can it get anymore pathetic than that, folks?

I've been watching some clips here and there of the Bush "Exit Interviews". Charlie Gibson, Katie Couric and Brian Williams drew straws to determine who got the first shot. Charlie won. And boy, did he toss some tough journalist questions. However, they weren't quite tough enough for yours truly. Therefore, I decided to put myself in that "let's draw straws" ring. And wouldn't you know it? I won. I get to interview him next. Here's just some of the questions I'll be asking. Feel free to offer your comments.

1) Your approval rating has been around 20% for quite some time. Why do you think that is? How does that make you feeeeeeeeeeeel? And have you also noticed that the media folks keep saying "Approval ratings are at an all time low" and yet that figure really doesn't change? Are you in on that one?

2) There are a lot of Americans, oh hell who am I kidding, there are a lot of earthlings who are afraid of Dick Cheney. I mean you gotta admit, there's just something off about the guy. You can confide in me, Mr. President. Do you have nightmares about Dick? And do you ever go hunting with him?

3) Tony Blair. Is he gonna come out of the closet or do you think he'll stay put?

4) Can you say "weapons of mass destruction" 5 times really fast?

5) Watch my mouth move as I form the following word. I'll say it slowly a few times to help you out. Then repeat it after me. "nu-clee-er". (This one's a trick. It's not actually a question but rather a statement of request. We'll see if he notices.)

6) I gotta ask you, how on earth did you manage to pull off two presidential election wins when you failed at every single business venture in your previous years?

Anyone notice Obama seems to be the President and Bush has taken on the new role of that annoying relative who has long past worn out his welcome?

There's talk about turning wastewater into drinking water. Uh huh. Ok, so let me get this straight. Folks want to see whether it is humanly possible to turn poop and pee and other things we normally want OUT of our body into drinking water.

...giving the reader time to process that...

Yikes. Or as my cousin used to say when she was a child "Grody to the max!" We can't even turn river water into healthy drinking water. Shouldn't we try and master that one first? The obvious question is: Who will be the guinea pigs for that little experiment? Feel free to offer your suggestions.


Pugs in Space said...

Ha ha great blog post! In regards to turning poop into water...the sheeples don't mind because they have been fed shit and kept in the dark for so long they won't even notice.

I have not heard that term Grody to the Max in soooo long! I totally used that when I was growing up! Too funny. Like oh my god, gag me with a spoon and grody to the max!

Pugs in Space said...

Oh yes and about who will be the Guinea Pigs for the water experient. Probably already happening and explains why the increase in chlorine taste and smell in our water. Weird shit (no pun intended) goes on at OSU that no one has any idea about.

Nina said...

It wouldn't surprise me if they were. We've also noticed a big increase in the number of days we smell the chlorine. We have a really good shower filter that filters that crap out. I've been wanting to buy an h20 distillation unit for the kitchen. I think it's a good investment.

oh muh gawd TOTALLY RAD gag me. lol

tkn said...

Well, apparently anyone who goes into space drinks recycled pee, so the technology exists. In theory its all one body of water right? Still, I like mine to have gone through the cycle a few times, maybe go through some wetland filtration, and a few hundred years percolating in an aquifer doesn't hurt either.