Fear not. For $40, you can leave them messages after you've disappeared, trying one last time to convince them of their desperate need for salvation and to claim the love and judgment of Jesus Christ. You read that correctly. Someone who has been a non-believer for decades can suddenly, in a flash, out of absolute fear and terror, authentically, purely, wholly and sincerely embrace an entirely new set of beliefs. Rather doubtful, huh. And I would think, being Jesus is supposed to be all-knowing, he'd be able to see through that rather forced attempt at redemption, right? What happens then? Sorry dude, it's into the firepit for you.
Once the rapture occurs, this website's fail-safe system will send out your messages automatically to your loved one's left behind via e-mail. Of course, there is a short window for the rest of us sinners to be "saved" and enter into the kingdom with the rest of those who vanished into thin air. After a few days or so, all hope is lost.
I wonder if there's a money-back guarantee. Say the rapture doesn't happen in your lifetime. I'd want my 40 bucks back. I also would think that if there is this rapture event, it would knock out electrical grids, rendering the use of e-mail null and void. I guess the rest of us would really be screwed then, huh?
Oh so sad how so many have been manipulated this way through fear. One one hand I laugh, but in my heart, I just feel sad. As I've seen in my own family, this sort of mind-control works on even the most intelligent, rational of folks. But that's the ugly, dark side of fear. Used enough, and especially if one was parented through fear and threats and is thus used to complying to such tactics, it's quite effective. In this case, sadly and terrifyingly effective.
All I know is that if I see Bush and Cheney lining up to go with Jesus, I'll wait for the next bus trip.
Website as lifted off of piglipstick's bloggo.
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