All The Leaves Are Brown......

only the skies aren't gray but rather bright blue. and no trails today either. planes are releasing only vapor trails today.

being it was such a nice day i decided to tackle the leaves. our house is situated in an idealic place. idealic if you are a leaf or twig or particle of dust looking for a place to call home. it seems as though the wind is always blowing in the perfect direction to gather all unwanted yard waste from our surrounding neighbors yards and placing it promptly in our front yard. after last year, i made the decision to wait until mid-november to rake. last year i swept and picked up every other day. it really was a waste of time and i know those damn leaves were laughing at me as they fell to the ground, slowly replacing the pile i had just dumped into the yard waste container. well i know it isn't mid-november yet, but the weather was dry and sunny and being we have trick-or-treaters visiting tomorrow night, i thought it would be a good idea to see the ground again.

2 hours later, back throbbing, hands cramped up and full of slivers (couldn't find the gloves) i was seriously rethinking my decision. the yard looks great--at the moment--but my body was and is in desperate need of a massage followed by a long soak in a hot tub. i have access to neither, so i am, um, visualizing.

as i swept, a song went through my mind. the landlord song. we aren't required to take care of the property outside--one of landlord's family members is supposed to be out every 2 weeks to do that. we're lucky if he shows up once a month. being my body was aching and i was no longer enjoying the warmth of the sun (it was making me sweat) or the crisp autumn air (it was making my nose run), i began to think how nice it must be to be a landlord................."oh i want to be a landlord, a landlord, a landlord.........i want to be a landlord, yes indeed.........it must be nice to own a home and have someone else take care of it..........it must be nice to own a home and have someone else pay for it.........it must be nice to dictate the price, dictate the price, dictate the price........and when all is said and done i will be laughing my way to the bank........oh i want to be a landlord, a landlord, a landlord.........i want to be a landlord, yes indeed!"

i noticed a bunch of acorns...............we've had a curious squirrel frequent our yard......my hub says it's to gather nuts........i think he has an alterior motive--to torment our dog......oh well, he will be disappointed to know most of his nuts went unplanted...........

being i was sweeping leaves into a pile and putting them into the yard waste, this meant i did a lot of bending and stooping over. i was wearing jeans--the kind that sit low on the waste. i love them--as long as i don't have to bend over. when you do that, you inevitably must pull them up as you pull yourself upright. and if the jeans sit low enough, you have to pull up the undies as well. my girlfriend says to wear a thong with the low-rider jeans. i simply laugh. men--ANY woman who tells you they are comfortable or that you get used to them is LYING. L Y I N G either that or having fabric shoved intentionally up her ass for hours at a time has cut off some oxygen supply to her brain, enabling her to think or speak clearly.

so.........i probably painted an unusual picture...........bending over, putting a hand on my lower back and moaning/groaning/swearing, straightening back up pulling up my jeans and undies then wiping my nose with the back of my sleeve...........what a sight of femininity, eh?